Roadkill Mystery Solved

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VThillman

Geezer
Neighbor
Joined
Nov 27, 2017
Messages
3,926
Location
Southeastern Vermont
The D.O.T found over 200 dead crows on highways recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was NOT Avian Flu.
The cause of death appeared to be from vehicular impacts. However, during analysis it was noted that varying colours of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analysing these paint residues it was found that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with motorbikes, while only 2% were killed by cars.
The Agency then hired an Ornithological Behaviourist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of motorbike kills versus car kills.
The Ornithological Behaviourist quickly concluded that when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow to warn of danger.
They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "bike!"
 
Couple days ago I was driving home from the big town on a country ,2 lane road,
As I went thru a small town , about 20 miles from home, a State Police started following me .

Thru every town , still on my bumper. I pass a slow truck . He passed the truck and gets right back on my tail.

I slow down , speed up , he's right on my bumper.

I'm getting nervous now, wondering what have I done.

Finally got to the road to turn to go to my house. I give a signal and I turn.

He turns right behind me, as soon as I turn onto my road , a wild turkey flew right into my windshield . Well the turkey bounced over my car and landed on the windshield of the cop.

His flashing lights turned on immediately....so I pulled over.

He wrote me a stinking ticket.


For flipping him the bird.

Jim
 
Couple days ago I was driving home from the big town on a country ,2 lane road,
As I went thru a small town , about 20 miles from home, a State Police started following me .

Thru every town , still on my bumper. I pass a slow truck . He passed the truck and gets right back on my tail.

I slow down , speed up , he's right on my bumper.

I'm getting nervous now, wondering what have I done.

Finally got to the road to turn to go to my house. I give a signal and I turn.

He turns right behind me, as soon as I turn onto my road , a wild turkey flew right into my windshield . Well the turkey bounced over my car and landed on the windshield of the cop.

His flashing lights turned on immediately....so I pulled over.

He wrote me a stinking ticket.


For flipping him the bird.

Jim
Ba-dum ching!

😂
 
Couple days ago I was driving home from the big town on a country ,2 lane road,
As I went thru a small town , about 20 miles from home, a State Police started following me .

Thru every town , still on my bumper. I pass a slow truck . He passed the truck and gets right back on my tail.

I slow down , speed up , he's right on my bumper.

I'm getting nervous now, wondering what have I done.

Finally got to the road to turn to go to my house. I give a signal and I turn.

He turns right behind me, as soon as I turn onto my road , a wild turkey flew right into my windshield . Well the turkey bounced over my car and landed on the windshield of the cop.

His flashing lights turned on immediately....so I pulled over.

He wrote me a stinking ticket.


For flipping him the bird.

Jim
Shows that some troopers have a sense of humor, eh?
 
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