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jimLE

Awesome Friend
Neighbor
Joined
Apr 3, 2013
Messages
8,826
Location
deep east texas
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was
nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an
envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to

'Dad.'

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope.
With trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my
new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos,
tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But
it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole
winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt
anyone.

We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that
live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so
Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can
get to know your grandchildren.

Love,
Your Son John

PS.
Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.
just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a Report
card that's in my center desk drawer.
I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.
 
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was
nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an
envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to

'Dad.'

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope.
With trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my
new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos,
tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But
it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole
winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt
anyone.

We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that
live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so
Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can
get to know your grandchildren.

Love,
Your Son John

PS.
Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.
just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a Report
card that's in my center desk drawer.
I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.
Awesome jim! You just put the biggest smile on my face all day long.
 
Major points for misdirection, but still going to have to have a chat about that report card mister.....
 
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was
nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an
envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to

'Dad.'

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope.
With trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my
new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos,
tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But
it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole
winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt
anyone.

We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that
live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so
Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can
get to know your grandchildren.

Love,
Your Son John

PS.
Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.
just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a Report
card that's in my center desk drawer.
I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.
Oh damn! That is priceless!
Wait.... My son better not try that! ;)
 

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