All temperatures in Fahrenheit
70 - Texans turn on the heat and unpack the thermal underwear.
People in Canada go swimming in the Lakes.
60 - North Carolinians try to turn on the heat.
People in Canada plant gardens.
50 - Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Canada sunbathe.
40 - Italian and English cars won't start.
People in Canada drive with the windows down.
32 - Distilled water freezes.
Lake Superior's water gets thicker.
20 - Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, and woolly hats.
People in Canada throw on a flannel shirt.
15 - Philadelphia landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Canada have the last cookout before it gets cold.
0 DEGREES - People in Miami all stop moving.
Canadians lick the flagpole.
20 BELOW - Californians fly away to Mexico.
People in Canada get out their winter coats.
40 BELOW - Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Guides of Canada are selling cookies door to door.
60 BELOW - Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic.
Canadian Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival"
classes until it gets cold enough.
80 BELOW - Mt. St. Helen's freezes.
People in Canada rent some videos.
100 BELOW - Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Canadians get frustrated because they can't thaw the keg.
297 BELOW - Microbial life no longer survives on dairy products.
Cows in Canada complain about farmers with cold hands.
460 BELOW - ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin
scale). People in Canada start saying,
"Cold 'nuff for ya?"
500 BELOW - @!#$ freezes over.
The Americans win a gold medal in hockey
~Author Unknown but submitted by a subscriber from Canada~
70 - Texans turn on the heat and unpack the thermal underwear.
People in Canada go swimming in the Lakes.
60 - North Carolinians try to turn on the heat.
People in Canada plant gardens.
50 - Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Canada sunbathe.
40 - Italian and English cars won't start.
People in Canada drive with the windows down.
32 - Distilled water freezes.
Lake Superior's water gets thicker.
20 - Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, and woolly hats.
People in Canada throw on a flannel shirt.
15 - Philadelphia landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Canada have the last cookout before it gets cold.
0 DEGREES - People in Miami all stop moving.
Canadians lick the flagpole.
20 BELOW - Californians fly away to Mexico.
People in Canada get out their winter coats.
40 BELOW - Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Guides of Canada are selling cookies door to door.
60 BELOW - Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic.
Canadian Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival"
classes until it gets cold enough.
80 BELOW - Mt. St. Helen's freezes.
People in Canada rent some videos.
100 BELOW - Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Canadians get frustrated because they can't thaw the keg.
297 BELOW - Microbial life no longer survives on dairy products.
Cows in Canada complain about farmers with cold hands.
460 BELOW - ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin
scale). People in Canada start saying,
"Cold 'nuff for ya?"
500 BELOW - @!#$ freezes over.
The Americans win a gold medal in hockey
~Author Unknown but submitted by a subscriber from Canada~
