Jokes and Humor

[Caribou]

I'm sure I can take a picture of a giant spider most any time where I live!! Everything is bigger in Texas!!

I was in Mexico, reading a hard bound copy of Exodus. I saw a spider on the floor and dropped the book directly on top of it from about three feet (1 meter). The spider tried to crawl away. It didn't get far but it did move the book.

 

[Woody]

 

[SheepDog]

All this time I thought "mansplaining" was code for man's complaining.
I guess it is close to the same thing. If you are a man is explaining to a woman, he is probably complaining.

 

[Pearl]

All this time I thought "mansplaining" was code for man's complaining.
I guess it is close to the same thing. If you are a man is explaining to a woman, he is probably complaining.

We don't listen anyhow

 

[Tim Horton]

Here in the far north... I have seen my Sweetie shoot, clean, cook a bear....
But DEMANDS I remove a spider the size of a dime from the wash room....
Why is that..

 

[Pearl]

Here in the far north... I have seen my Sweetie shoot, clean, cook a bear....
But DEMANDS I remove a spider the size of a dime from the wash room....
Why is that..

We just do that for your egos! "Oh, you just saved me from that tiny spider, thank goodness"! "Supper will be a little late, gotta kill the bear first"!! That's just how us gals work!;

 

[Chaosdawn]

Here in the far north... I have seen my Sweetie shoot, clean, cook a bear....
But DEMANDS I remove a spider the size of a dime from the wash room....
Why is that..

Evolutionary phobia. I'm the same way, I can deal with anything except spiders.

I've tried to be brave but the second it moves I throw whatever's in my hand at it, which has ranged from a paper towel to my laptop.

 

[Magus]

I had a 3" brown spider (not a recluse!) use me for a heat source last night until he decided he wanted in my coke. cheeky bugger went in the floor. Spiders eat other stuff I can't stand. my enemies enemy is my friend.

 

[Bacpacker]

Wife just ran across this

A Blue whales anus can open up to 5.5'....
Making it the 2nd largest A**hole in the world to
Joe Biden

 

[jshay]

Some years back Chevrolet and Toyota were doing a project car together for import to the USA.

Toyota came up with a name for the car they were wild about.

They called it the "Toylet"

 

[jshay]

 

[LadyLocust]

for @dademoss

 

[dademoss]

for @dademoss
View attachment 86688

Oddly enough, we closed a cat into the fridge by accident. Where is Catarina? finally found her. That poor cat was allergic to fleas, and flea collars and before the "good stuff" was invented.

 

[LadyLocust]

Oddly enough, we closed a cat into the fridge by accident. Where is Catarina? finally found her. That poor cat was allergic to fleas, and flea collars and before the "good stuff" was invented.

Here's another

 

[LadyLocust]

It's meeeee

 

[LadyLocust]

 

[LadyLocust]

 

[LadyLocust]

 

[LadyLocust]

 

[LadyLocust]

 

[LadyLocust]

 

[dademoss]

View attachment 86694

Here's another

Unfortunately, we have a lot of abandoned/community cats around. The really sad part is when you find one that that is tame and pettable. On the bright side, they keep the rodents in check. They slowly get trapped/neutered and released back, and they know where to find water and shelter.

 

[dademoss]

View attachment 86703

I know where that tree is

 

[LadyLocust]

 

[jazzy]

Here in the far north... I have seen my Sweetie shoot, clean, cook a bear....
But DEMANDS I remove a spider the size of a dime from the wash room....
Why is that..

spiders are much more dangerous and scary than silly old bears. and they dont taste half as good.

 

[dademoss]

View attachment 86699

Well, I gotta say, since the wife got a horse, there are way fewer Questions about boxes of ammo on the coffee table.

Put the brand new split reins on top, and she kinda stops there

 

[dademoss]

spiders are much more dangerous and scary than silly old bears. and they dont taste half as good.

A little hot sauce, they slide right down, and get the flies that flew into your mouth during the night.

 

[dademoss]

 

[Pearl]

Wife just ran across this

A Blue whales anus can open up to 5.5'....
Making it the 2nd largest A**hole in the world to
Joe Biden

Hillary and Obama are even bigger!

 

[Lenny]

We don't listen anyhow

Yes, dear.
<DUCKING>
LOL