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Many Manners seem to be a thing of the past
- Thread starter Weedygarden
- Start date
Help Support Homesteading & Country Living Forum:
@Weedygarden we always do take extra to events as most of our friends do a bring a plate for occasions as it saves the host a lot of time and lets them socialise too rather than being in the kitchen all the time. As we are LDS we usually bring enough food between us to feed an army for these very occasions and reasons when people don't RSVP and just turn up.
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Some people will sue claiming prejudice. So it is hard to find good help and hire them too.
Like you said Weedy people now have less etiquett than they did before we went rogue.
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(Edit--I found this online, not my rules, but some people don't even get it when they've been told the rules)
The Rules for attending a cookout:
1) Do not show up if you were not invited by the host. I don't care who you know!
2) If you were invited do not bring extra people with you.
3) Always ask do I need to bring anything.
Even if the answer is no, bring a bag of chips at minimum.
4) Should you bring anything at all, bring it with the intention of leaving it.
5) If you have not contributed financially to the event you "ARE NOT" entitled to leave with anything wrapped in aluminum foil or in a Tupperware container.
6) Everyone has rules at their house, be respectful or don't come.
7) If your children are not well behaved, you must stay at home with your children. (Sorry, not sorry)
The Saints will mingle with the Aints, if you can't handle that, stay home!
9) This is not the time for you to learn the latest line dance.. Sit down somewhere!! You had all of spring and winter to practice!
10) If you smoke, idc what it is, sit yourself down in an isolated area . No one wants that stuff blowing in their face or over their food.
11) This goes along with #7... The cookout is not a free babysitting service. You brought your child YOU watch your child.
12) The food is not going to run out. Stop making these gigantic plates knowing you can't eat it all.
13) Stop asking who made the potato salad. If I told you, you wouldn't know any way!
14) Before you trip about the sodas not being "Name Brand", ask yourself did you contribute one dime.
15) Before you open a fresh bottle of water finish the one you started.
That's enough for now, please govern yourselves accordingly!
The Rules for attending a cookout:
1) Do not show up if you were not invited by the host. I don't care who you know!
2) If you were invited do not bring extra people with you.
3) Always ask do I need to bring anything.
Even if the answer is no, bring a bag of chips at minimum.
4) Should you bring anything at all, bring it with the intention of leaving it.
5) If you have not contributed financially to the event you "ARE NOT" entitled to leave with anything wrapped in aluminum foil or in a Tupperware container.
6) Everyone has rules at their house, be respectful or don't come.
7) If your children are not well behaved, you must stay at home with your children. (Sorry, not sorry)
9) This is not the time for you to learn the latest line dance.. Sit down somewhere!! You had all of spring and winter to practice!
10) If you smoke, idc what it is, sit yourself down in an isolated area . No one wants that stuff blowing in their face or over their food.
11) This goes along with #7... The cookout is not a free babysitting service. You brought your child YOU watch your child.
12) The food is not going to run out. Stop making these gigantic plates knowing you can't eat it all.
13) Stop asking who made the potato salad. If I told you, you wouldn't know any way!
14) Before you trip about the sodas not being "Name Brand", ask yourself did you contribute one dime.
15) Before you open a fresh bottle of water finish the one you started.
That's enough for now, please govern yourselves accordingly!
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16) Never touch another person's grill/smoker/tongs/spatula/etc. The host will cook/flip/take off/burn/apply cheese as the cook sees fit.
Oh where on earth do I start?
People don't control their children or dogs - ill behaved of either are not welcome at my house. We did not put shoes on furniture. We did not ask for anything. We did not complain or interrupt when adults were talking. We did not talk back to adults. There are so many more.
People don't control their children or dogs - ill behaved of either are not welcome at my house. We did not put shoes on furniture. We did not ask for anything. We did not complain or interrupt when adults were talking. We did not talk back to adults. There are so many more.
Funny - I grew up on a ranch: never feed another man's horse or pet his dog (perhaps if it's someone you know well, but only if asked first).
And considering tomorrow is July 4th, a day when people torture their neighbors with cruel and unusual punishment.
So remember the Golden Rule of backyard BBQ. -- Thou shalt feed EVERYONE downwind!
OK, I made that up, but I think it's a good rule.
So remember the Golden Rule of backyard BBQ. -- Thou shalt feed EVERYONE downwind!
OK, I made that up, but I think it's a good rule.
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I agree, however my son thinks I am assistant cook, guess he flip the script.
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Yes! We have several potlucks throughout the year and we provide most of the meat and ask folks to bring their own drinks and a dish to pass. I love how the people who don't know (or ask) what to bring will leave a bag of dorito's in the shopping bag on the table and when nobody opens them, they disappear after the event.
Don't get me wrong.....I don't want your evil triangle chemical chips, but really? How cheap can you get?Again....yes! You came to eat....didn't bring much (if anything) but want a bag full of pulled pork to go? Do I look like I run a To-Go BBQ joint? Some people just amaze me. Clueless.......
Although, leave half your carrot cake and we'll talk.........
One of the worst as far as I am concerned is the Mixed company courtesy that used to exist.
It is almost impossible to go into a large restaurant with family and not hear a table that is filled with people shouting expletives at each other.
Some that are very vulgar and If you ask for relief you usually get a loud vulgar rebuff full of expletives and a threat of bodily harm to either take up or slink back to your seat.
I have been in a situation where a group of college football players did that to a friend of mine and he took them up with a quick draw of his pocket pistol planted between the biggest ones eyes and dared him to breathe hard.
I asked my friend if they could leave straight out the door and not look back, I put my hand on my Mk5 380 1911 and told him if he pulled off and they did not go out we would kill them all and I had his back live or die, he said "okay" so I said "wait,' 'Boys if you want to live all of you move to that side but him and start out the door don't look back get in your cars and leave the parking lot OK"
They all nodded, my friend backed up a foot and they left.
We never spoke just went back to the table and finished.
Sometime you meet people who don't believe in threats
It is almost impossible to go into a large restaurant with family and not hear a table that is filled with people shouting expletives at each other.
Some that are very vulgar and If you ask for relief you usually get a loud vulgar rebuff full of expletives and a threat of bodily harm to either take up or slink back to your seat.
I have been in a situation where a group of college football players did that to a friend of mine and he took them up with a quick draw of his pocket pistol planted between the biggest ones eyes and dared him to breathe hard.
I asked my friend if they could leave straight out the door and not look back, I put my hand on my Mk5 380 1911 and told him if he pulled off and they did not go out we would kill them all and I had his back live or die, he said "okay" so I said "wait,' 'Boys if you want to live all of you move to that side but him and start out the door don't look back get in your cars and leave the parking lot OK"
They all nodded, my friend backed up a foot and they left.
We never spoke just went back to the table and finished.
Sometime you meet people who don't believe in threats
There’s so many manners that are a common curtesy, but then there’s learned etiquette…. I’m all for helpful hints and reminders about both.
I mean just because a person may step out of line, that doesn’t mean he was born an ******* if he just didn’t know he was being offensive.
But then when a person is truly being disruptive and offensive… how’s a person supposed to correct them without doing the same?
There’s a conundrum.
I mean just because a person may step out of line, that doesn’t mean he was born an ******* if he just didn’t know he was being offensive.
But then when a person is truly being disruptive and offensive… how’s a person supposed to correct them without doing the same?
There’s a conundrum.
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If you're going to throw a party for someone, like your spouse or s/o, and it isn't a surprise, then ask them who they would like to have invited instead of inviting who you want to be there.
Next time put a pin hole in the bag so you can squeeze the air out of it and crush all the chips.……, I love how the people who don't know (or ask) what to bring will leave a bag of dorito's in the shopping bag on the table and when nobody opens them, they disappear after the event.
They’ll get the hint.
People seem more and more unable disagree with eachother and still love eachother- I'm not sure how to better word that. Especially over text- they don't give eachother the benefit of the doubt anymore and assume the other party takes an aggressive tone or is trying to harm them etc.
"No" Has become offensive. "Your wrong about.." has become a personal attack.
I think its because people have become more insecure- perhaps that's the internets fault for exposing us to more than what's natural... but the people I respect most are the ones who can wholeheartedly and honestly tell you that you are wrong about something and say it for your benefit and argue with you about it but still show respect, even kindness in their objectivity without turning red or raising their voice and without looking down on the other party for their ignorance etc. Even if no conclusion is found, the ability to not let that negative interaction lower your opinion of the person disproportionately is just super rare nowadays.
I think our perception of time is beyond ******. We act as if we have so little time that people just aren't worth arguing with anymore. As a Christian, I plan on living forever (with perhaps one little recess) so the way I percieve my timescale as it effects my values are very different- and that's something that I try to find in other people. Nobody knows the whole truth of anything, the idea is we can work together to get closer to it...
"No" Has become offensive. "Your wrong about.." has become a personal attack.
I think its because people have become more insecure- perhaps that's the internets fault for exposing us to more than what's natural... but the people I respect most are the ones who can wholeheartedly and honestly tell you that you are wrong about something and say it for your benefit and argue with you about it but still show respect, even kindness in their objectivity without turning red or raising their voice and without looking down on the other party for their ignorance etc. Even if no conclusion is found, the ability to not let that negative interaction lower your opinion of the person disproportionately is just super rare nowadays.
I think our perception of time is beyond ******. We act as if we have so little time that people just aren't worth arguing with anymore. As a Christian, I plan on living forever (with perhaps one little recess) so the way I percieve my timescale as it effects my values are very different- and that's something that I try to find in other people. Nobody knows the whole truth of anything, the idea is we can work together to get closer to it...
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Ever been to a potluck where families show up with NOTHING to share? I have! And I have been told that if it is a potluck, you don't need to bring anything because there is always lots of food.
We had potlucks when I was teaching with the families of the school. The parents who were gracious enough to run the potluck would come searching for food outside of the gym where the food was. By the time I would hand over my food, get in line and get to the food, there would either be no food, or only corn chips, but I would see families who got in line with no food to contribute. The gracious parents who ran the potluck would order pizza's and were asking for donations. I always wondered how many of the non contributors would donate for pizza.
We had potlucks when I was teaching with the families of the school. The parents who were gracious enough to run the potluck would come searching for food outside of the gym where the food was. By the time I would hand over my food, get in line and get to the food, there would either be no food, or only corn chips, but I would see families who got in line with no food to contribute. The gracious parents who ran the potluck would order pizza's and were asking for donations. I always wondered how many of the non contributors would donate for pizza.
A person's property is their castle.
You don't go to someone's house at weird hours.
You don't walk on the lawn to the front door. You use the obvious walkway.
Generally, you don't go uninvited unless there is business, emergency, preplanned dropping off /picking up stuff.
And exception would be kids asking another kid to play but in that case..knock on front door only n leave if no answer.
No looking in windows, garage, going into backyards etc.
Consideration towards elders regardless if you know them or not. Give help when needed
Be generous
in actions, words, time and stuff when you can. It's good mojo..
You don't go to someone's house at weird hours.
You don't walk on the lawn to the front door. You use the obvious walkway.
Generally, you don't go uninvited unless there is business, emergency, preplanned dropping off /picking up stuff.
And exception would be kids asking another kid to play but in that case..knock on front door only n leave if no answer.
No looking in windows, garage, going into backyards etc.
Consideration towards elders regardless if you know them or not. Give help when needed
Be generous
in actions, words, time and stuff when you can. It's good mojo..
