Sound familiar?

[Frodo]

I am sitting at my work bench when my wife walks in, I saw your buddy John while I was in town, He said to give you this 25 dollars
She hands me 3 dollars
I say, This is only 3 dollars
She said
I had to stop at the store

WTH???

 

[Cascadian]

We can go on a multi stop shopping spree and by the end of the day my wife knows how much is left in my wallet. It's kinda annoying and impressive at the same time.

 

[backlash]

I thought this was going to be the old joke about the neighbor guy that offered a woman $100 for sex then her husband asked if the neighbor gave her the $100 he owed him.

 

[Pearl]

She is really good to you Frodo!! Seriously!! What will you spend the 3$ on, oh, yeah, your wife!! Plus some more, because what can you get for 3$?? You go girl!;

 

[Frodo]

It does not bother me
I told my blushing bride the first year we were married that I do not care what nor will I question where money is spent as long as..
Bills are paid
Food is in the pantry
Any purchase over $50. We must both agree to. This one has bit me in the butt a couple of times. Lol.

 

[The Lazy L]

My bride TOLD me she was NOT going to “waste” HER money on bills, THAT was what my money was for!

 

[Pearl]

My bride TOLD me she was NOT going to “waste” HER money on bills, THAT was what my money was for!

.....and then you said "I Do"!

 

[Frodo]

My bride TOLD me she was NOT going to “waste” HER money on bills, THAT was what my money was for!

In a marriage, There is no MY money
There is no separate bank accounts
The money is in one account it is used to pay bills, and to keep the family unit afloat

Seperate accounts is admitting you are not a couple but are individuals Ehich in my opinion is the first step to a divorce
When the words “I Do” are said you lose your halter and are given a yoke, The yoke is for both of you to pull together in unison towards a common goal.

 

[Cascadian]

I am not giving financial advice but my wife has never told me I can't buy a boat without consulting her. I have never had a boat but I am just kinda keeping that tucked away for someday.

 

[winds-of-change]

my husbands first wife spent money like crazy. She never worked outside of the home. When she left him for another man, she left him in $120,000 in debt. He had to refinance his house to pay it off. The running joke is he paid for his house twice. Knowing this. When we married, I’d save all receipts on the kitchen table and when he came home from work I’d tell him I went to *whatever store* and spent * this amount of money*. Then I told him the receipts were on the table. After a few weeks, I realized he never looked at the receipts. He trusted me. He said he’s not going to hold me to his past wife’s transgressions.

 

[backlash]

My wife handles the checkbook. She is very good at staying on top of the bills.
My credit score is over 800 thanks to her.
As long as the ATM will spit out money when I want it I'm happy.
Neither one of us over spend and we always discus any major purchases.
A new gun is not considered a major purchase by the way.
She did buy a new dining room set after a new shotgun purchase years ago.
Somehow the $600 shotgun was evened out with a $3000 furniture purchase.
Must be that new math I heard about.

I worked with guy that had a wife that was out of control when it came to money.
She put him so far in debt he will never recover.
She had a bunch of CC he didn't know about and when she didn't keep up with the payment he had to refinance the house at 18% during the Carter years.
I guess that can be expected when you get a streetwalker pregnant and are dumb enough to marry her.

 

[Weedygarden]

My credit score is over 800 thanks to her.

After I corrected the ex's financial misbehavior, it took me some years to get back to this. One guy at my credit union told me he didn't think he had ever seen a credit score as high as mine. But he hadn't seen it a few decades earlier when it was completely destroyed, not of my doing. It can take years to rebuild it, while being very tight fisted and intentional about spending. Basic needs are first, always, and paid for.

 

[The Lazy L]

In a marriage, There is no MY money
There is no separate bank accounts
The money is in one account it is used to pay bills, and to keep the family unit afloat

Seperate accounts is admitting you are not a couple but are individuals Ehich in my opinion is the first step to a divorce
When the words “I Do” are said you lose your halter and are given a yoke, The yoke is for both of you to pull together in unison towards a common goal.

In theory I agree with you 100%

My wife should be in politics…for every $1 she has she spends $1.10

 

[Frodo]

In theory I agree with you 100%

My wife should be in politics…for every $1 she has she spends $1.10

My wife is the frugal one
I am the one that gets out of control

I have Champaign taste on a beer budget

 

[Supervisor42]

In a marriage, There is no MY money
There is no separate bank accounts

Separate accounts is admitting you are not a couple but are individuals which in my opinion is the first step to a divorce.

I took a different path with my second marriage.
My first wife taught me a valuable lesson, (I still consider it the same as having a 'learner's-permit' and learning to drive). After she had buried us so far into debt, she moved on to the next sucker. It took me nine months of living as a pauper to dig myself back out.
I had read that 9 out of 10 marital disputes were over money. When I remarried, we both had separate accounts and I saw no reason to combine.
If one of us spends too much, there is no argument.
The only thing we have ever had that was "joint" was the house payment. We would both enclose an equal check each month. When I sold it, we split the money 50/50.
33 years of bliss we have enjoyed so far.

 

[Magus]

I thought this was going to be the old joke about the neighbor guy that offered a woman $100 for sex then her husband asked if the neighbor gave her the $100 he owed him.

Me too, Glad it wasn't!

 

[Spikedriver]

My bride TOLD me she was NOT going to “waste” HER money on bills, THAT was what my money was for!

What's hers is hers, and what's yours is hers.

Been there, done that. Ain't happening twice...

 

[Frodo]

What's hers is hers, and what's yours is hers.

Been there, done that. Ain't happening twice...

True story
Our crew was installing underground plumbing on a house, The form setters were also working on the forms. One of the form setters was acting really sad, We knew him and he was usually a cheerful guy, So I took a shot across his bow with a smart ass comment
What’s your matter? Puppy die?
Oh Lawd!! I should have kept my mouth shut
He said
My ole lady left me, she emptied the bank account and took every thing out of the house while I was at work. She EVEN took the damn Welcome mat!!!
ME. ****, that sucks
Fast forward about a month
Our crews are on the same job
Dude is unhappy AGAIN!!
So I ask what’s up
He said she came home, all his stuff was sold and she was broke
2 days latter, she had gotten his bank info
Raided his bank account again, stole the stuff he had bought to replace the stuff she stole the first time and was gone

I just shook my head and offered these words

You are an idiot.

 

[Spikedriver]

^^^ My situation wasn't that bad. My ex had a certain way of looking at things, which meant that as a husband I was supposed to do what I had to do, to make her life be what she wanted it to be. But once it was over, it was over. Getting back together was discussed at one time, and I said, this is a bad idea. I didn't need the hassle.

Being married is a lot more lonely than being alone...

 

[Pearl]

^^^ My situation wasn't that bad. My ex had a certain way of looking at things, which meant that as a husband I was supposed to do what I had to do, to make her life be what she wanted it to be. But once it was over, it was over. Getting back together was discussed at one time, and I said, this is a bad idea. I didn't need the hassle.

Being married is a lot more lonely than being alone...

Glad you have your beautiful daughter, one good thing out of that situation!!

 

[Magus]

I had a fiancee wipe me out, run off with my boss who I believed was my friend, then got me fired from my job right after they got back, all this right after I got whacked by that wetback eating a taco on a Hesyter.

Fun fact:
Neither of them ended well. I had NOTHING to do with it.

 

[bkt]

My bride TOLD me she was NOT going to “waste” HER money on bills, THAT was what my money was for!

If someone I was involved with told me that, we would immediately be uninvolved. If you want a sugar-daddy, keep looking. If you want to be an adult - and contribute in a meaningful way to keeping the home running - then we can talk.

No offense intended...just giving my two cents.

 

[The Lazy L]

If someone I was involved with told me that, we would immediately be uninvolved. If you want a sugar-daddy, keep looking. If you want to be an adult - and contribute in a meaningful way to keeping the home running - then we can talk.

No offense intended...just giving my two cents.

No offense taken.

I was twenty and in love…I complied with her wishes and kept “our” finances seperate.

Now I can afford to retire debt free and wife says she’ll have to work until she dies.

 

[dademoss]

Lori and I have separate checking accounts and a joint savings account. Our income is my IRA right now, so we share the "income". She pays some things, I pay others, left over from the days we both worked.

 

[Amish Heart]

All of what we have is ours. We discuss big purchases and wishes. Neither of us had debt coming into our marriage almost 40 yrs ago, and we both worked. But after child number one through child number 5, I stayed home and he worked a good paying job. I homeschooled, too. And kept our home. I started our business with our money (a private school) when our children were older, and worked outside the home for 18 yrs. And now we're both retired and living on his SS and our savings, and I take care of him. And still, all of what we have is ours, both of ours equally.

 

[Spikedriver]

All of what we have is ours. We discuss big purchases and wishes. Neither of us had debt coming into our marriage almost 40 yrs ago, and we both worked. But after child number one through child number 5, I stayed home and he worked a good paying job. I homeschooled, too. And kept our home. I started our business with our money (a private school) when our children were older, and worked outside the home for 18 yrs. And now we're both retired and living on his SS and our savings, and I take care of him. And still, all of what we have is ours, both of ours equally.

What you have would be the ideal. Wish it could work that way for everyone...

 

[Pearl]

What you have would be the ideal. Wish it could work that way for everyone...

Yes!! That is how it SHOULD be!!

 

[Pearl]

So.... I'm to the boss!! We have our separate money, and our own money!

 

[Amish Heart]

Keeping money separate is one thing, but obviously when someone divorces, debt is shared, and there's no way around that. Even if one spouse doesn't know about what the other is spending it on.

 

[Rocky's Way]

What you have would be the ideal. Wish it could work that way for everyone...

Precisely! A commitment is meant to be serious. The problem in the world today is that we've allowed it to become a "Me, me, me" world.

"It's become all, my way or the highway."

The reason both sides of my family grandparents stayed married was because of morals and ethics, and because they didn't expect to "win" every discussion.

To me, any marriage, or serious relationship, needs at least a 75%/25% "give in" ratio. Both of you. Be willing to give in more than half the time, and it will pay dividends.

But, nobody can give in 100% of the time because they lose their own sense of identity. You can't give in until you aren't you anymore.

That's not what I would call a relationship. More of an owner/servant sort of arrangement.

As a society, sadly we most certainly have drifted off course.