We didnt get the urn or anything. He's just sitting upstairs in a box in the clock stand.
My wife's ex (who was one of my best friends, and died young, widowing her), his ashes are in an ornate dragon adorned urn (avid D&D player), in our home. Her father, is in an ornate horse sculpture urn (horses were his life), on the mantle over the fireplace in the den (or, the Western room.....(each one of our rooms has a theme).
My father is buried in one of the veteran cemeteries, in GA. Her mother is interred in a mausoleum, in a cemetery in the city where we both work. My mother is still around, and hopefully for much longer.
My grandparents, are in an OLD cemetery in a town where it's mostly only a few families. As some may know from older posts, my family has been here since before the US was a nation, hehe. It was odd, seeing so many graves with your last name on 'em.
We even had small marble headstones for workers (slaves actually, as these date back to before the Civil War, and my family was farmers), and yes, in the same cemetery. Apparently, from all accounts (both my family, and an actual surviving descendant of one of the families that worked for mine back then), my family was a bit more progressive, and treated them as extended members of the family who worked the fields alongside my family. Look, I'm not happy or proud of this particular part of my heritage, but I am at least happy to have gotten the chance to speak to Luther (the descendant) when I was younger, and he never had an unkind thing to say about how my family treated his and others.
I think too many stories like this are lost due to shame at our ancestors, etc. I wonder how much of THIS kind of thing was the norm, vs. what we are exposed to. Don't get me wrong, the practice of it is barbaric and inhuman...and I'm thankful it's no longer a part of the civilized world....but I'm also happy to hear that though my ancestors engaged in the practice, it seems they approached it more as cheap labor (not free, as I know they were provided their own housing, needs, leisure, etc.). The way Luther put it, his ancestors always had good meals, a good roof over their heads, clean and mended clothes, and were never treated as anything but valued labor and even family. This seemed to be reflected in the small matte marble headstones that dated to the 1800's. So while I'm ashamed it ever happened, I'm glad to have heard that my family doesn't seem to be a bunch of monsters.