Jokes and Humor

Homesteading & Country Living Forum

Help Support Homesteading & Country Living Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
1720393230185.jpeg
 
Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem.
 
This actually happened a couple days ago near huntsville al. The article said a house and 3 cars were damaged by an out of control garbage truck. No injuries except the garbage man with minor bumps and bruises.

How bad a driver does one have to be to lose control of a garbage truck? 🤣 Could it be the resident never separated their paper and plastic? 🤪

He had speed too! Maybe a hostile divorce? Boyfriend's house? 🤣

Garbage al.jpg
 
Last edited:
He had speed too! Maybe a hostile divorce? Boyfriend's house? 🤣

View attachment 157104
Definitely intentional. No skidmarks on the turf and the 90° angle of attack just screams:
"Well, you won the house and the car in the divorce, how about I toss a truck in too?" :D
 
Last edited:
Definitely intentional. No skidmarks on the turf and the 90° angle of attack just screams:
"Well, you won the house and the car in the divorce, how about I toss a truck in too?" :D
...And he totaled both cars, see another pic.
I worked on those trucks when I worked for WM, and those are monsters! :oops:
Fully loaded, they weigh over 65,000 pounds.
fe5e6378-b509-43cc-97cf-888db7824387_1140x641.jpg
 
Last edited:
This actually happened a couple days near huntsville al. The article said a house and 3 cars were damaged by an out of control garbage truck. No injuries except the garbage man with minor bumps and bruises.

How bad a driver does one have to be to lose control of a garbage truck? 🤣 Could it be the resident never separated their paper and plastic? 🤪

He had speed too! Maybe a hostile divorce? Boyfriend's house? 🤣

View attachment 157104
Could have been the result of the driver having a medical emergency beyond his control. Stroke, heart attack, blood glucose problems.
 
Last edited:
Could have been the result of the River having a medical emergency beyond his control. Stroke, heart attack, blood glucose problems.
They said: "garbage man with minor bumps and bruises". They would have mentioned any other condition.
...And he would have hit the house at an angle if he had veered off the road.
66888ee2419a3.image.jpg
 
Last edited:
Back
Top