Jokes and Humor

[dademoss]

 

[GrannyG]

 

[Sentry18]

 

[rusty]

 

[phideaux]

Jim

 

[phideaux]

Jim

 

[phideaux]

Jim

 

[dademoss]

 

[phideaux]

Jim

 

[phideaux]

Jim

 

[phideaux]

Jim

 

[Sentry18]

 

[joel]

View attachment 45117

I worked with a guy who bought a new truck with power everything & had two children after the purchase, then wrecked the truck. With children he went for the low cost replacment truck, manual windows. His 5 year old could not find a button to get the window down, he had to show her the Knob & how to use it.

 

[Mr.Meer]

 

[Mr.Meer]

 

[Sentry18]

 

[Sentry18]

 

[Sparky_D]

View attachment 45136

Only if the guns are functional...

 

[rusty]

 

[Peanut]

For my fellow vets… Military acronyms, hundreds of them... for example "STANAVFORLANT" pronounced “Sta-Nav-For-Lant” which means "Standing Naval Forces Atlantic". A destroyer I served on was docked in Halifax, Nova Scotia. Tied outboard of us was a Canadian Frigate. A canadian admiral came to visit the frigate.

He had to be “piped” across our ship… (Recognized ship wide via intercom as he crossed our ship on his way to the frigate). A friend who was standing quarterdeck watch had to do the announcement, acronym and all. He was horrible at pronouncing acronyms…

This acronym started “Can” (canadian), Com (command), Nav (naval), etc, etc. etc, about 15 letters long.

My friend who had to pronounce this acronym mangled it… Then finally said “CanCom Canuck, Crossing”!

Everyone on the ship who heard it died laughing, including the Canadian Admiral… I was on the quarterdeck and saw it happen… I still laugh when I remember it.

Needless to say, my friend got in a lot of trouble. But he never had to stand petty officer of the watch again either.

 

[Mr.Meer]

 

[phideaux]

Jim

 

[dademoss]

 

[Mr.Meer]

 

[Mr.Meer]

 

[dademoss]

 

[Sparky_D]

View attachment 45211

Explains why my ex had me change most of the diapers...

 

[Sentry18]

 

[backlash]

Need to cock that 1911 like J.M. Browning designed it to be carried.

 

[zannej]

Chicken on wet concrete reminds me of when we had a contractor out to do concrete pouring. The contractor said that if there was an animal within 5 miles it would walk in the stuff while it was wet. We had dog prints, cat prints, and possom prints. LOL.