Jokes and Humor

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[dademoss]

 

[dademoss]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[dademoss]

 

[Peanut]

Now this is a real brake through! Traps that open when rocks are thrown at them.

 

[dademoss]

Now this is a real brake through! Traps that open when rocks are thrown at them.

View attachment 75905

Been a while since I had to deal with one, I'm glad those days are over

 

[joel]

I had a 1966 twin beam Ford F100 & the front brakes were wider than the back (for stopping power??).
If you mixed them up the tire rim would cause them to lock up the brakes, no do not ask how I know that, just take my work for it.
Yes I am glad I do not have to deal with them, now.

 

[Peanut]

I had a 69 ford truck. One week I replaced all the brake shoes. I got the fronts adjusted but didn't finish the rears. My left rear tended to lock up. My girlfriend's friend suddenly had some kind of crisis so we had to go to Lake Tahoe to pick her up at a casino.

I dropped my keys at the valet. We waited in front a bit. I could hear my truck going up in parking deck, headers, glass packs, the valet kid was having fun. Until he tried to stop. I could hear the left rear locked up.

When we came out later the head valet guy just gave me my keys and said "Sir, you should go get your truck yourself"

I guess it scared the crap out of the kid!

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[dademoss]

 

[dademoss]

I'll see myself out.

 

[LadyLocust]

 

[Bluetick21]

 

[Caribou]

In the heyday of the British Empire, a new commanding officer was sent to a South African outpost to relieve the retiring colonel.

After welcoming his replacement and showing the usual courtesies (gin and tonic, cucumber sandwiches etc.) which protocol dictates, the retiring colonel said, "You must meet my Adjutant, Captain Smithers, he's my right-hand man and is really the strength of this office. His talent is simply boundless."

Smithers was summoned and introduced to the new CO, who was surprised to meet a hunchback, one eyed, toothless, hairless, scabbed and pockmarked specimen of humanity, a particularly unattractive man less than three feet tall.

"Smithers, old man, tell your new CO about yourself."

''Well, sir, I graduated with honours from Sandhurst, joined the regiment and won the Military Cross and Bar after three expeditions behind enemy lines. I've represented Great Britain in equestrian events and won a Silver Medal in the middleweight division of the Olympics. I have researched the history of…"

At that point, the Colonel interrupted, "Yes, yes, never mind that Smithers, he can find all that in your file. Tell him about the day you told the witch doctor to f#@# off."

 

[masterspark]

View attachment 75780

Sparky_D, I'm a piper and I can't count how many times I've seen that one. I love the facial expressions.

 

[masterspark]

 

[Caribou]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]