- Joined
- Dec 8, 2017
- Messages
- 11,711
She from South Carolina or maybe North Carolina. As A young person, I heard persons say Brazilian, what they meant was billion.
Jokes and Humor
- Thread starter phideaux
- Start date
Help Support Homesteading & Country Living Forum:
She from South Carolina or maybe North Carolina. As A young person, I heard persons say Brazilian, what they meant was billion.
- Joined
- Dec 8, 2017
- Messages
- 11,711
- Joined
- Dec 8, 2017
- Messages
- 11,711
- Joined
- Dec 8, 2017
- Messages
- 11,711
- Joined
- Sep 4, 2020
- Messages
- 10,685
- Joined
- Dec 24, 2017
- Messages
- 753
'Twas The Night Before Christmas (Hillbilly Style)
'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the hills
The kinfolk were drinkin' and tending their stills
The longjohns were hung by the chimney with care
No stockings were found, just underwear
The children were nestled so high in their bunks
Their quilts made of skins from rabbits and skunks
Granny with her false teeth and gun on her knee
Was waiting for Santa as she sat by the tree
From out of the barn there arose such a noise
We thought it was Grandpa drinkin' with the boys
But what to my wandering eye should appear
It was just cousin Cleatus in mama's brassiere
And then from the rooftop we heard it at last
Like the sound of thunder or a shot gun blast
We have Christmas dinner, it's finally here
Granny kidnapped Santa while we shot his deer
Venison all covered with onions for stew
And even old Santa enjoyed some too
His belly was full when he walked out the door
But he couldn't resist when we offered him more
Well that's the story of our Christmas here
Merry Christmas to all 'til the same time next year
'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the hills
The kinfolk were drinkin' and tending their stills
The longjohns were hung by the chimney with care
No stockings were found, just underwear
The children were nestled so high in their bunks
Their quilts made of skins from rabbits and skunks
Granny with her false teeth and gun on her knee
Was waiting for Santa as she sat by the tree
From out of the barn there arose such a noise
We thought it was Grandpa drinkin' with the boys
But what to my wandering eye should appear
It was just cousin Cleatus in mama's brassiere
And then from the rooftop we heard it at last
Like the sound of thunder or a shot gun blast
We have Christmas dinner, it's finally here
Granny kidnapped Santa while we shot his deer
Venison all covered with onions for stew
And even old Santa enjoyed some too
His belly was full when he walked out the door
But he couldn't resist when we offered him more
Well that's the story of our Christmas here
Merry Christmas to all 'til the same time next year
My brothers and younger cousins were all in their Santa years. We were having a family dinner at my aunts house when my dad piped up, "Where does Santa come from." In unison, "From the North Pole, Uncle John." "And who lives the furthest north?" In unison, "You do Uncle John." Well, when he comes to my house I'm going to shoot the reindeer and put them in my freezer." The riot was on.
At least I have being from Texas going for me
- Joined
- Dec 8, 2017
- Messages
- 11,711
DW invest in the same market you do.
Watch the video before reading.
This classical dance was created in China and broadcast at Shanghai Disneyland.
They are not dance artists, but robots made in China.
The performance time is only about 5 minutes, but the waiting time for tickets is 4 hours, and the ticket price is 499 yuan. ($75)
It is more complex than Japan's and has perfect facial expressions.
Both dancers are robots. They look so real that they cannot be distinguished from actual people.
This scares the hell out of me!
- Joined
- Dec 8, 2017
- Messages
- 11,711
I like the vid, I put it in the joke section, I prefer it the way I got the email. You're welcome to order one. Woman or machine, one dance with her would result in a call to 911.
Speaking of CNN, I force myself to watch them occasionally, just for punishment.
Their reporter was in Mayfield, telling us about all the power being out.
"Poles are down everywhere, and all lines are dead. Like these:"
They pan the camera down, and show the wires under her shoes, that she is standing on.
Ok. I confess, I did have an evil thought about Darwin removing stupid from the gene-pool.
Last edited:
Juicy
Jim
Jim
