Jokes and Humor

[LadyLocust]

 

[LadyLocust]

 

[jshay]

 

[Pearl]

View attachment 87331

I am SOOOOO thankful the 1995 Ford Taurus rental I had did NOT have GPS! Just sayin'!!

 

[jazzy]

View attachment 87335

i really want one of those signs

 

[joel]

i really want one of those signs

So do I, but want tigers, they are harder to see.

 

[kd4ulw]

 

[kd4ulw]

 

[dademoss]

View attachment 87358

46 bucks to fill up my Subaru.

 

[VThillman]

[QUOTE="LadyLocust, post: 469687, member: 355"
He's a lefty, let him sleep. When he wakes, he will see the deer's track, and run him down.

 

[Haertig]

46 bucks to fill up my Subaru.

$120 to fill up my truck

 

[Magus]

True story:
I'm shopping and minding my own business back about mid-covid outbreak when this "Karen-ish" brood sow and her snot nosed loin spawn pass me in the isle, I'm wearing my bio-hazard respirator
and sunglasses. the kid looks up at me and shrieks like a raped ape and huddles behind mommy and babbles something. "You scared my little Timmy!" She snarls at me. "You look like a monster in that thing!" I turn to the kid and lift my glasses and lower my breather and give him my best smile. the kid takes one look and pees himself with his eyes and mouth wide open! I put my get up back in place and say:
"There, NOW he's properly scared" and I drove off.
If you've never met me, and you haven't. I tend to scare the hell out of "normal civilized people" just being there. I'm just "WRONG" they say. I say good, I got nothing to say to those kind of jerks anyway.

 

[dademoss]

brood sow and her snot nosed loin spawn pass me in the isle,

Luckily, I m not considered normal civilized people, that made me laugh.

 

[Woody]

 

[Bacpacker]

View attachment 87365

Here hold my beer

 

[Magus]

Here hold my beer

Beat me to it! ROFL

 

[joel]

46 bucks to fill up my Subaru.

II had 18 miles left in my tank, when I filled up $74.01 for 18+ gallons.

 

[Magus]

Sometimes I'm glad I'm a hermit.

 

[kd4ulw]

 

[Cascadian]

I am late to the **** joke party, but this still makes me consider getting vaccinated.

 

[Haertig]

https://www.cnn.com/2022/06/01/health/sweetened-coffee-death-risk-wellness/index.html
Everybody has the exact same death risk. 100%.

 

[joel]

I am late to the **** joke party, but this still makes me consider getting vaccinated.View attachment 87391

To little too late.

 

[VThillman]

I could do 2 out of 3.

 

[SouthCentralUS]

View attachment 87393
I could do 2 out of 3.

Constipated????

 

[VThillman]

Constipated????

Too old to cut the mustard any more.

 

[bkt]

I am late to the **** joke party, but this still makes me consider getting vaccinated.View attachment 87391

With my luck, I'd get a guy who looked like that. :/

 

[backlash]

With my luck, I'd get a guy who looked like that. :/

That's the kind of luck I have.
I was traveling and went to a place a guy recommended to get my hair cut. Every stylist was smoking hot woman. I got the only gay guy in the place. Top it all off they charged me $65 and that was in 1985. I had words for the guy that told me to go there.

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[angie_nrs]