Jokes and Humor

[angie_nrs]

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[Magus]

View attachment 118599

Easy Peasy:
1-If the barrel of that weapon was 16+ inches he could piss on the deer too!
2-When hunting, he gets 1 shot, in here it's a machine gun! lots of spread!
3-No rifling in the bore.
4-No scope.
5-Hearing the guy in the next stall cuss and say: Damn it I dunked again!" tends to make you shake a bit!

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Woody]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[Pearl]

View attachment 118634

I am SO putting these on people's cars!! True story: years ago there was a young woman trying to park her Suburban at Target. She had the isle blocked and of course I was going down that isle and now blocked in with cars behind me. I got out of my car and asked her if she would like me to park it for her!! She said please and got out, three little kids inside!! I, a total stranger, parked her Suburban, she thanked me, I went to a totally different isle to park! I bet she couldn't get that big thing out of that tight spot !! It was still there when I left!!

 

[backlash]

I watched a girl park her little pickup so close to the car on the passenger side her Mom had to climb out the drivers door.
They came in the restaurant and her and the waitress were looking out the window and she asked if they should call 911 and get a police officer to come and back her truck out.
I told her I would back it out for her. She ask do you think you can?
I went out and first made sure she had not already hit the other car. She had about an inch between the cars.
I simply let it roll back with the wheel slightly turned till it was clear.
I move her truck over about 3 feet because that was how much space empty space she had on the drivers side.
Passing a driving test doesn't make one a driver.

 

[Curmudgeon]

 

[jazzy]

laurel and hardy dance to bille jean

 

[Curmudgeon]

 

[zoomzoom]

 

[jazzy]

View attachment 118645

no

 

[Lenny]

I watched a girl park her little pickup so close to the car on the passenger side her Mom had to climb out the drivers door.
They came in the restaurant and her and the waitress were looking out the window and she asked if they should call 911 and get a police officer to come and back her truck out.
I told her I would back it out for her. She ask do you think you can?
I went out and first made sure she had not already hit the other car. She had about an inch between the cars.
I simply let it roll back with the wheel slightly turned till it was clear.
I move her truck over about 3 feet because that was how much space empty space she had on the drivers side.
Passing a driving test doesn't make one a driver.

One time three of us had company minivans and we met for lunch at a restaurant. We had to park in the back lot because the front was full. Anyway, we ate, finished, came back out and saw that some azzhole had parked in a way that we couldn't get out. We decided to use use one of the minivans to push his car out of the way, so one guy got into his minivan and I was guiding him into the azzhole's car. The azzhole dashed out of the restaurant to say he would move it, so obviously he did it deliberately. We out-azzholed him!

 

[Curmudgeon]

 

[Curmudgeon]

 

[Curmudgeon]

 

[Curmudgeon]

 

[zoomzoom]

 

[zoomzoom]

 

[WVDragonlady]