Jokes and Humor

[jazzy]

 

[LadyLocust]

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The walk way so nothing . About 10’ away is a bookcase.

 

[dademoss]

The walk way so nothing . About 10’ away is a bookcase.

Hit them with the organic chemistry book, it's a deadly weapon.

 

[Pearl]

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A pen!!

 

[LadyLocust]

A pen!!

Whew! At least it wasn’t the letter opener or the candlestick

 

[Pearl]

Whew! At least it wasn’t the letter opener or the candlestick

 

[Magus]

 

[joel]

An Elon Musk flame thrower.

 

[old tex]

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It's funny or maybe I'm just funny or odd. I of course know the difference & I use "there" properly. But somewhere around 40 years old & thought about it & figured that I really didn't care about the proper use of them. I guess that I turned it around & figured that if you couldn't translate your from you're or maybe substitute them then I didn't mind if your (wink) confused.

 

[dademoss]

View attachment 171625

It's worse when you find the 5 1/4 floppy with ascii "porn"

 

[Lenny]

Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect.
One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help.
There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys.
Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple; and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.
Question: Who was the survivor?
Answer:
The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man.
**** Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke.
**** Men keep scrolling.
So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the woman must have been driving. This explains why there was a car accident.
By the way, if you're a woman and you're still reading, this illustrates another point: Women never listen.!!