Jokes and Humor

[d_marsh]

 

[Lenny]

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Imagine how mad that doctor would be if an auto mechanic treated his car that way.

 

[dademoss]

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Taco Bell?

 

[angie_nrs]

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Where do those turkeys come from?????
If I had one for Thanksgivining we could eat for a month!!

 

[jazzy]

more evidence choclate is critical for good health

 

[INresponse]

Where do those turkeys come from?????
If I had one for Thanksgivining we could eat for a month!!

The first year we started with chickens (chicks) we also got 3 broad breasted white turkey polts. The typical turkey raised for stores to sell at Thanksgiving are raised for 3 months then sent to the freezer. Well, we raised ours from about early April to late November. The one that lasted the longest (they have trouble walking and living past a certain weight) was harvested the Monday before Thanksgiving and was walking around at 68 pounds, and gave us 52 pounds of meat and bones when prepped for dinner. Imagine seeing a turkey in the grocery store meat section close to 3 times the normal size? We had to separate the bird into sections, the breast was cooked in one large roasting pan, a leg/thigh/wing in another roasting pan, the other leg/thigh/wing in a third roasting pan, and the back and giblets were in a fourth pan with the stuffing. I might add it was the juiciest, best tasting turkey we ever had, when we sliced the breast the juice poured out like a mountain spring. There were 23 of us at the table that year. We all had leftovers to last a week with plenty for more plates of everything and turkey sandwiches and then soup to finish the last of it.

I requested/demanded one of the legs and I couldn't finish it, couldn't even get down to the tough stuff. There was so much meat on that leg it could have fed 2 hungry men, if'n I wanted to share.

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[havasu]

This reminds me of @Frodo

I went fishing this morning, but after a short time, I ran out of worms.
Then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth.
"Frogs are good bass bait," I thought to myself.
Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frog in his mouth, I grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog, and put it in my bait bucket.
Just then, I realized I had a problem, how was I going to release the snake without getting bit?
So, I grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniel's and poured a little whiskey in its mouth. The snakes eyes rolled back and he went limp. I released him into the lake without incident and carried on fishing using the frog.
A little later, I felt a nudge at my foot.
There was that same snake with two more frogs in his mouth.
Life is good in the South.

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[dademoss]

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As a bit of trivia, Bizzaro puts "easter eggs" for lack of a better term in his comics : https://www.bizarro.com/secret-symbols

 

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[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

 

[jazzy]

 

[dademoss]