Jokes and Humor

[jazzy]

ok. who stole my recipe forthanksgiving turky

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[Peanut]

Greg Biffle backed his car up to the door of his HS gym and smoked his tires until the entire gym was full of tire smoke.
Him and his buddies that opened the door were all suspended.

Ours wasn’t nearly so dramatic but it was funny! A whole gym full of silent fans and players wondering what the heck just happened. I dared a friend to steal the game ball in the middle of a hs basketball game. He stood against the wall behind a backboard and waited for the ball to bounce his way.

He finally caught the ball. Most fans are looking, the ref put his hands out to catch the return. Instead Doug ran out of the gym, out the main doors and into the night, with the ball… It went dead silent. Some people looked up at my friends and I, might have been our laughter.

 

[ClemKadiddlehopper]

My past future BIL, laid skid marks with his motorcycle down the high school hallways the month before his graduation. Rather than being expelled, he spent his last month of high school plus one month plus of summer on his hands and knees with a tooth brush scrubbing those skid marks off the floors.

 

[Woody]

 

[bkt]

ok. who stole my recipe forthanksgiving turky


View attachment 111598

Yeah, so I get accidentally making something that LOOKS like magma, but it's quite another thing when you actually melt the sides of the pot. That's real skill, right there.

 

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[Woody]

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

Two guys grow up together, but after college one moves to Georgia and the other to Texas. They agree to meet every ten years in Florida to play golf.

At age 32 they meet, finish their round of golf, and head for lunch.

"Where you wanna go?"

"Hooters."

"Why Hooters?"

"They have those servers with the big boobs, the tight shorts, and the gorgeous legs."

"You're on."

At age 42, they meet and play golf again.

"Where you wanna go for lunch?"

"Hooters."

"Again? Why?"

"They have a cold beer, big screen TVs, and side action on the games."

"OK."

At age 52 they meet and play again. "So where you wanna go for lunch?"

"Hooters.

"Why?"

"The food is pretty good and there's plenty of parking."

"OK."

At age 62 they meet again.

After a round of golf, one says, "Where you wanna go?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"Wings are half price and the food isn't too spicy."

"Good choice"

At age 72 they meet again.

Once again, after a round of golf, one says, "Where shall we go for lunch?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"They have six handicapped parking spaces right by the door and they have senior discounts."

"Great choice."

At age 82 they meet and play again. "Where should we go for lunch?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"Because we've never been there before."

"Okay, let’s give it a try."

 

[Woody]

 

[Bacpacker]

View attachment 111706

It kills my wife when I let out a big ole WEEEEEEELLLLL DOGGIES

 

[Woody]

At the ripe old age of 77, grandpa had decided to marry a young girl of 20.

Grandpa's doctor tried to explain that at his age sex with a young girl

could be dangerous, even fatal. Grandpa, not the slightest bit perturbed

replied "Oh well, if she dies, I'll just get myself another one."

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

Goulash day??? That was always leftovers from the week with some tomato sause over macarroni!

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

You need the roll of caps tighter tomake it work.

 

[Woody]

Avon Calling.

 

[Woody]