Jokes and Humor

[winds-of-change]

Lol. I know this plumber!!!!!!

View attachment 122596

Is it you?

 

[angie_nrs]

How long are ya gonna stare at this?

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[Bacpacker]

How long are ya gonna stare at this?
View attachment 122630

Not as long as the first time I saw it

 

[LadyLocust]

How long are ya gonna stare at this?
View attachment 122630

I have seen that before. I hate it. It's so annoying - can't stop looking at it and it's nonsensical! (which is the point )

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

Just when you think nothing could surprise you...

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

 

[Pearl]

Just when you think nothing could surprise you...

View attachment 122647

I am surprised!! I had NO idea it was ARTIFICIALLY FLAVORED!!

 

[zoomzoom]

 

[zoomzoom]

 

[Woody]

 

[Lenny]

View attachment 122659

You ain't got no class. LOL

 

[dademoss]

 

[Woody]

 

[Woody]

Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect.

One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help.

There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys.

Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple; and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.

Question: Who was the survivor?

Answer:

The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man.

**** Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke.

**** Men keep scrolling.

So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the woman must have been driving. This explains why there was a car accident.

By the way, if you're a woman and you're still reading, this illustrates another point: Women never listen.!!

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[zoomzoom]

 

[Cascadian]

My coworker was at the movies and overheard 2 young women in front of him. One said I had 5 guys last night. The other woman said damn girl, how you felling today? Poor fella had to explain to his kids why he shot soda out of his nose.

 

[zoomzoom]

 

[zoomzoom]

 

[Alaskajohn]

 

[Lenny]

View attachment 122699

FINALLY!!!! Thank you!

 

[Woody]

 

[dademoss]