Jokes and Humor

[Caribou]

I got proposal on the plane headed home yesterday. In Wrangell, after the passengers disembarked, an attractive young lady with a computer boarded the plane, walked up to me and said, "I need your last name." Me, "I'm sure you're a lovely woman but I'm already married."

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Supervisor42]

View attachment 73712

I've seen that in person down here.
It is real.

 

[kd4ulw]

 

[The Lazy L]

 

[phideaux]

Anybody interested in a free ride in a helicopter for 4 people?! I'm still looking for 2 more people to join us. We leave early Saturday (October 31st) morning from Louisville, KY and will fly to Nashville, TN, where we will have breakfast and then on to Charleston, SC to a yacht for lunch.
Then, we’ll do a flight along the coast to see the Myrtle Beach and returning to Charleston for dinner, then fly back home.

If interested please pm me..

Preferably someone with a helicopter and yacht, otherwise we can't go...

Jim

 

[joel]

The army took me up, once was enough!

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[Pearl]

Anybody interested in a free ride in a helicopter for 4 people?! I'm still looking for 2 more people to join us. We leave early Saturday (October 31st) morning from Louisville, KY and will fly to Nashville, TN, where we will have breakfast and then on to Charleston, SC to a yacht for lunch.
Then, we’ll do a flight along the coast to see the Myrtle Beach and returning to Charleston for dinner, then fly back home.

If interested please pm me..

Preferably someone with a helicopter and yacht, otherwise we can't go...

Jim

Ok, here's our chance!!!! I have a friend who is a Careflight pilot and owns a small boat. We will need some pretty good medical excuses if caught! One of us would have to ride in the stretcher outside the helicopter cab, will look a little more real when the authorities step in!! Could be an option if no one else steps up with a better offer

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[angie_nrs]

View attachment 73764

He's a horrible tipper!

 

[Neb]

View attachment 73764

I checked in to a hotel and when handed the card key I told 5he clerk...

Cool.
My room number is 2 times the square root of my zip code.

The clerk was not entertained.

Ben

 

[dademoss]

And following the erudite posts above, is my contribution:

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

if you need a belly laugh....

Embarrassing Photos of Jeff Foxworthy, Ron White and Larry the Cable Guy

 

[dademoss]

A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft. As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with shock, his young attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and waved to the two aliens as they took off.
"Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally uttered.
"Yeah," said attendant. "So?"
"Didn't you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the attendant. "So?"
"Didn't you see the letters 'UFO' on the side of that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the attendant. "So?"
"Don't you know what 'UFO' means?!"
The attendant rolled his eyes. "Good grief, boss! I've been working here for six years. Of course, I know what 'UFO' means
'Unleaded Fuel Only.'"

 

[phideaux]

Jim

 

[Caribou]

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[angie_nrs]

 

[dademoss]

 

[dademoss]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]