Strange sayings we use

[Frodo]

Go outside and practice falling down
I’ll will be along in a minute

 

[Frodo]

Ain’t noth’n in Texas but Steers and Queers, I do not se any horns on your head

 

[ClemKadiddlehopper]

He can't tell his arse from a hole in the ground.

 

[Frodo]

How’s your momma and them?

 

[Frodo]

She did not get hit with the ugly stick
She was beaten with a limb

I

 

[Frodo]

Not enough sense to poor piss out of a boot with the directions written on the bottom

 

[Caribou]

Cold enough to freeze the balls off of a brass monkey. A monkey, traditionally made of brass, is a square plate with divots made in it to place cannon balls. each layer makes a narrower square forming a pyramid. Being of different materials they shrink or swell differently. The brass monkey shrinks faster in the cold that the iron cannonballs. Eventually it gets cold enough that the monkey can no longer hold the balls.

 

[ABR]

Would lose their head if it weren't attached

Stick it where the sun don't shine

They'd pee in their own face and think it was rainin'

Well put me in a dress and call me Sally

Well I'll be damned

Brought a knife to a gunfight

Easier to ride a camel thru the eye of a needle

Rainin cats and dogs

 

[Peanut]

Not a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of!

It’s used locally to mean poverty, said of someone who’s poor.

Supposedly… started in the city of New Orleans in 1862. A yankee general named Ben Butler was in charge after the city fell. The ladies of the city were prone to empty their chamber pots out the window… as union soldiers walked by. Of course this practice was ‘outlawed’… hence “Not a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of!” Sarcasm...

These events started a feud between Gen Butler and the ladies of NOLA. Lots of things happened, most disrespectful toward women.

A business sprang up over night… Chamber pots with Gen Butlers likeness were sold everywhere… even as far as Vicksburg and Mobile.

A Benjamin "Beast" Butler Chamber Pot...

 

[Supervisor42]

Not a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of!

It’s used locally to mean poverty, said of someone who’s poor.

Supposedly… started in the city of New Orleans in 1862. A yankee general named Ben Butler was in charge after the city fell. The ladies of the city were prone to empty their chamber pots out the window… as union soldiers walked by. Of course this practice was ‘outlawed’… hence “Not a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of!” Sarcasm...

These events started a feud between Gen Butler and the ladies of NOLA. Lots of things happened, most disrespectful toward women.

A business sprang up over night… Chamber pots with Gen Butlers likeness were sold everywhere… even as far as Vicksburg and Mobile.

A Benjamin "Beast" Butler Chamber Pot...

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I had heard that phrase all the years I was growing up in Bama and always wondered about it's historic origins.
Thanks for finally answering that question.

 

[Spikedriver]

That went over like a fart in church! (Usually said after somebody says something that your your mama or grandmama didn't take kindly to...)

 

[Spikedriver]

"You just put your mouth in gear while your brain was still in neutral."

My dad would say that if any of us kids said something that pissed mom off...

 

[Frodo]

Mind your P’s and Q’s
Meaning is to mind your own business
The origin of the saying comes from the Bars / Pool Halls in Great Britain
It is said that the bartender kept a tally of what each patron drank, They serve ale in pints and quarts. When the bartender would stick his nose into a customers conversation he would be told to mind his P’s &Q’s. (Pints and quarts)
Which equates to mind your own business

 

[Magpie]

I heard this one yesterday from a lecturer; I thought it appropriate with the wars going on. Have no idea where it came from though.
'It's like two wolves and a sheep deciding what to have for dinner.'

My favourite was one my mother used to say: 'Whats that got to do with the price of eggs?'

 

[Magus]

She did not get hit with the ugly stick
She was beaten with a limb

I

Fell out of the ugly tree and smacked every branch on the way down.

That went through like a fart in a flower garden. (got noticed fast!)

 

[Lenny]

I'm taking that one personally (lol), and did you call me an ass in the birthday thread earlier??

Okay kids! Go to your rooms! LOL

 

[Lenny]

She did not get hit with the ugly stick
She was beaten with a limb

I

The version I heard was, s/he didn't get with an ugly stick, the whole forest fell on him/her.

 

[Pearl]

Okay kids! Go to your rooms! LOL

But she started it!!

 

[Lenny]

But she started it!!

YOUNG LADY, YOU'RE THE REASON i'M GOING BALD! LOL

 

[Pearl]

YOUNG LADY, YOU'RE THE REASON i'M GOING BALD! LOL

 

[Lenny]

Back in the 1950s, my friend and I walked into his house as him mom was hanging up the phone with a sigh of relief. His mom said, "She could talk the leg off an iron steer!"

 

[Spikedriver]

Remember "Confucius says"? I worked with an old guy that had a million of those. That was 30 years ago, but I still remember a couple.

Confucius says, "Man who farts in church, sits in his own pew".

Confucius says, " Man who walks through airport turnstile sideways, is going to Bangkok".

(Say that second one out loud... )

 

[ClemKadiddlehopper]

Confucius say, "man with water on brain, needs tap on head."

 

[Frodo]

I heard never point at anything you do not want to kill
A gun is loaded until you have verified it safe

Over and over a minimum of 100 times before I ever heard
Take a deep breath and squeeze

 

[Frodo]

Confucius say, "man with water on brain, needs tap on head."

Confucius say
Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with stinky finger

 

[Bacpacker]

Confucius also say man who stand on toilet, get high on pot

 

[winds-of-change]

“Fine as frog hair”.
“Handy as tits on a Bull”.

 

[Neb]

Ringing off the hook.

Ben

 

[Pearl]

Ringing of the hook.

Ben

And what does that mean??

 

[Neb]

And what does that mean??

Ringing off the hook.

Describes an old phone that was ringing so often the handset would vibrate off of the hook.

Ben