The Ladies

[d_marsh]

So far the boy went home and stayed there until what I am presuming was when he had to go to work. His car and his phone have never been that far apart. Tomorrow will be more of a test when the daughter goes to school. She only has one class and a short 3 hour shift at work. I will be going to both but not "with" her. We had a nice chat over dinner about personal safety & security. According to the tracking number the Tasers will arrive at the compound Thursday, wish I would have shipped them here. I have to be there Thursday anyway, plus no Saturday date night this week as the lady has to be out of town. This whole situation is making her nervous about leaving the girl alone so I may offer to have her come out too. She has never been there and doesn't have very much time to see the place.

 

[teeceetx]

If the "boy" were normal, then I'd agree that he got the message.

But my sense is that he isn't, and at some point he will return. He's not mentally normal, and I doubt he has fully gotten the message.

 

[Snowman]

Thar bee some powerful msg's in that Note written to Your Lady Daughter...!!! Prepare Her and You Know what I mean...!!

 

[d_marsh]

The boy was at school attending a class the same time the daughter was. She said she saw him walking toward her and had to "force" herself not to smile, again she is just a smiley happy person not trying to invite crazies to stalk her. She said that he must have seen her because he stopped dead in his tracks, turned around and hot footed his way down the hallway. She did not see him again after that. I knew he was there from the trackers and it was all I could do to not go inside with her. The trackers never went near her car, the coffee shop or the apartment. Now we are both here in the apartment hanging out. She does not have a Wednesday class so tomorrow morning I will be going with her to work again then out to lunch with her mother.

 

[d_marsh]

Unrelated to the daughter or the stalker, I have been looking at remote properties, cabins, etc. Seems the states East and North of me are a lot less expensive and not all that far away. I did find one of those bunkers for sale in South Dakota that is already finished and ready to go. 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, a 40' shipping container, solar power system, back up generator, water well with triple water filtration system and more. The price even includes ALL of their preps and supplies. Only $300,000 but I am sure there is some flexibility there.

 

[Bacpacker]

Not sure id want to live in SD, no trees. But dang if they ain't set up nice

 

[d_marsh]

Not sure id want to live in SD, no trees. But dang if they ain't set up nice

The move-in ready fully stocked remote bunker calls to me. But I also know the lady would look at it, shoot me the stink eye and start looking at places in the mountains for 4-5x that price. Although the map shows some serious tree covered mountains close by, but definitely not right around the bunker. I google mapped and it was thinking there would be like 10-20 bunkers, looks like 100+.

 

[Snowman]

What is that opening in the bottom Pantry in the 3rd picture, on the Left Side going down...?!?

Is that the access for the Tunnel Escape Route...?!? Would bee a Shame if You were blocked at the Entrance...!!!

 

[d_marsh]

 

[d_marsh]

What is that opening in the bottom Pantry in the 3rd picture, on the Left Side going down...?!?

Is that the access for the Tunnel Escape Route...?!? Would bee a Shame if You were blocked at the Entrance...!!!

Those stairs go up into a storage room. There is a main access point and an escape tunnel in the back. What looks like a window in the kitchen is really just a square light.

 

[Snowman]

Was just looking a little closer and saw that it is "UP"...!!! Glad there is an Escape Tunnel but me Feels maybee You and the Gals would have a better Life around Mother Nature and Outside...!! Fallout Adobe would bee Great to Have if Needed...!

 

[shanrose]

Decided I should start a thread about this instead of polluting other threads. Especially since this is apparently going to be an ongoing issue and the only person I talk to about her just laughs and makes whipping sounds. So good news, you are now all my unpaid relationship counselors. Congrats.

If you already know the story, feel free to skip this paragraph:

Long story short, I met this woman at a party and things progressed very quickly. Next thing you know we end up back at my place, which to be honest is not my usual thing as I prefer going back to their place or a hotel. Hell I usually avoid giving out my last name. Yes I am that guy, feel free to judge, never claimed to be a saint. Anyway I wasn't complaining as most of my prior catch and release dates were basic white girls and this one was a bit more exotic. Regardless she just up and refused to be released. Days turned to weeks, weeks to months and she never left. At the same time we were having a lot of fun, if you get my drift, and the place had never been cleaner. But in hindsight this may have all been an invasion concealed as a sexcapade. I made it ridiculously clear that marriage and kids were NOT in my future. I drove that point home like a Chinese immigrant pounding spikes into railroad ties. Yet she stuck around and along the way got rid of her place, moved her stuff in including dogs, made herself a gate key, learned the electronic key code to my door, had her mama come visit, became passionate about guns, demonstrated her ability to cook, found a way to meet my pops, started saying I love you even though I don't say it back, started referring to me in the presence of others as "her man", bought a car not so dissimilar to mine, started doing all my laundry, bought me a dresser and "us" a bed, bought a sofa and a recliner... and the story continues. I am sure I am missing dozens of WTH moments too. Like @Pearl trying to make me think she is waiting to express her political opinions until she is fully versed in mine and the fact that I live in a common law state so I am pretty sure she has marital rights even though we aren't married.

Anyway today she suddenly says "Are you okay if I make you my in-case-of-emergency contact and my beneficiary?". I was like Biden giving a speech, I just stood there confused unable to utter actual words. How does one answer that question!? Beneficiary? Does this mean 401K, life insurance, what? Either way it sounds like a commitment. Like for life. It also made me wonder if she is going to take out life insurance on me. Can she do that? Just take out a policy? Eventually I just muttered "I guess so" and she got all bubbly and excited, like I did something tangible there. Then she asked if I would send part of it to her sister if something ever happened to her, as her mama lives with her sister. Like we're all family now. I need to be more alert to these out of the blue questions of hers. I wonder what's coming next.

Sounds like she's trying hard to please you. I was trying to help someone who just got divorced so I was watching a lot of 'Dating Delusions' and he exposes a lot about American women so if you got someone good you may want to keep her. However, with a caveat. The guy I tried helping went through a painful divorce. He dated a woman from Ecuador that he met on a dating app who tried to get him to marry her after dating a month for her green card. I was very wary and warned him to step carefully. She did things for him too. Anyway she got him to drive her to a Taco Bell where she met someone and they exchanged something. She asked him to drive her to another Taco Bell and he became suspicious. She again met someone and they exchanged something. He broke up with her - believing that she was using him to possibly sell...not candy...

Just be careful. Women will put their best foot forward initially but the truth has a way of bubbling to the surface.

 

[shanrose]

...I will wait patiently for the next shoe to drop:
"Well, I set you up as my beneficiary, it's now time for you to set me up as your beneficiary" .

Pretty astute!

 

[d_marsh]

Sounds like she's trying hard to please you. I was trying to help someone who just got divorced so I was watching a lot of 'Dating Delusions' and he exposes a lot about American women so if you got someone good you may want to keep her. However, with a caveat. I tried helping a guy who went through a painful divorce. He dated a woman from Ecuador that he met on a dating app who tried to get him to marry her after dating a month for her green card. I was very wary and warned him to step carefully. She did things for him too. Anyway she got him to drive her to a Taco Bell where she met someone and they exchanged something. She asked him to drive her to another Taco Bell and he became suspicious. She again met someone and they exchanged something. He broke up with her - believing that she was using him to possibly sell...not candy...

Just be careful. Women will put their best foot forward initially but the truth has a way of bubbling to the surface.

"She" is a distant memory. A sexy Brazilian distant memory with anger issues.

 

[shanrose]

"She" is a distant memory. A sexy Brazilian distant memory with anger issues.

Glad you found it out early if you believe you're incompatible. I will say that relationships are hard. Someone said above that we all are broken in one way or another. There are no perfect people - but like my young protege` found out, you have to step carefully. He recently went back on the dating apps and there his ex was - looking for a new sucker to drive her around to conduct her 'business.' Not that I really blame her - she was in terrible circumstances. However, I was concerned that she might hurt him.

As far as the anger issues: people from different countries tend to have specific traits. I'm Irish and I can tell you that what they say about the "fighting Irish" is true. I have a hot temper that I inherited from my Irish father. I suppose someone could label that as "anger issues" if they wanted to put that spin on it but I only express anger when it's justified. I don't know about the Brazilian woman but women from south of the border are also known to be hot-tempered. I don't think having a hot temper is necessarily a bad thing especially if she had other positive traits.

I feel for anyone dating in today's society. I could not believe how people have become - watch a few "Dating Delusions" or "Kevin Samuels" and you learn a lot.

 

[Peepaw from Tex]

Unrelated to the daughter or the stalker, I have been looking at remote properties, cabins, etc. Seems the states East and North of me are a lot less expensive and not all that far away. I did find one of those bunkers for sale in South Dakota that is already finished and ready to go. 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, a 40' shipping container, solar power system, back up generator, water well with triple water filtration system and more. The price even includes ALL of their preps and supplies. Only $300,000 but I am sure there is some flexibility there.

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I wish I could find that, to where I am wanting to move. That is awesome and I love it. Wife probably wouldn't like. But I damn sure do.

 

[shanrose]

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That's surreal looking. It reminds me of a cemetery.

 

[d_marsh]

That's surreal looking. It reminds me of a cemetery.

And that was just one section.

 

[Bacpacker]

That's surreal looking. It reminds me of a cemetery.

I was thinking a far off hay field with round bales all over it

 

[d_marsh]

Glad you found it out early if you believe you're incompatible. I will say that relationships are hard. Someone said above that we all are broken in one way or another. There are no perfect people - but like my young protege` found out, you have to step carefully. He recently went back on the dating apps and there his ex was - looking for a new sucker to drive her around to conduct her 'business.' Not that I really blame her - she was in terrible circumstances. However, I was concerned that she might hurt him.

As far as the anger issues: people from different countries tend to have specific traits. I'm Irish and I can tell you that what they say about the "fighting Irish" is true. I have a hot temper that I inherited from my Irish father. I suppose someone could label that as "anger issues" if they wanted to put that spin on it but I only express anger when it's justified. I don't know about the Brazilian woman but women from south of the border are also known to be hot-tempered. I don't think having a hot temper is necessarily a bad thing especially if she had other positive traits.

I feel for anyone dating in today's society. I could not believe how people have become - watch a few "Dating Delusions" or "Kevin Samuels" and you learn a lot.

The Brazilian was like #207 out of 208 on my long list of ladies. I have good thoughts about 208 though. She's got loads of money and calls me her favorite person. Plus I am pretty sure she has cast some kind of spell on me.

 

[shanrose]

The Brazilian was like #207 out of 208 on my long list of ladies. I have good thoughts about 208 though. She's got loads of money and calls me her favorite person. Plus I am pretty sure she has cast some kind of spell on me.

Glad you found someone to your liking Romeo

 

[Weedygarden]

The Brazilian was like #207 out of 208 on my long list of ladies. I have good thoughts about 208 though. She's got loads of money and calls me her favorite person. Plus I am pretty sure she has cast some kind of spell on me.

Isn't it chemistry? Many people can tell us about the chemistry that they felt when they met someone. I have experienced meeting someone for the first time and the attraction was instant, strong and mutual.

I know a woman who walked into a classroom. A man sitting in the class saw her and told his friend sitting beside him that he was going to marry that woman that he just saw for the first time in his life. And he did!

But there is more to it than just chemistry. It is the shared values that some can never come to terms with. There is maturity, personality, and more that makes it work.

 

[d_marsh]

Isn't it chemistry? Many people can tell us about the chemistry that they felt when they met someone. I have experienced meeting someone for the first time and the attraction was instant, strong and mutual.

I know a woman who walked into a classroom. A man sitting in the class saw her and told his friend sitting beside him that he was going to marry that woman that he just saw for the first time in his life. And he did!

But there is more to it than just chemistry. It is the shared values that some can never come to terms with. There is maturity, personality, and more that makes it work.

I can't really label it, but there is definitely something there beyond the conscious choice to be together. At times it seems to transcend anything man or woman could have decided, created or established.


So we just had a nice conversation about domestic partnerships and civil unions. Seems someone has been doing some internet searches and mapping out a potential future together as part of the house buying process. No not right away, down the road a ways. Maybe a long ways. But the one thing we could not figure out is what one calls the other in a civil union? You're not husband and wife, so what do you say? Partner maybe, or civil girlfriend. "This is my contractually obligated lover and housemate, she can kill me if I'm in a coma then keep all my assets". Maybe we can do what the alphabet people do and just pervert a standard term like Huzband and Wive. She suggested we could potentially just go with Lady & Man and then not give a crap what anyone else thinks or perceives of our relationship. She's so damn feisty.

 

[teeceetx]

Significant Other?

 

[Weedygarden]

Significant Other?

Or partner?

 

[d_marsh]

Significant Other?

Or partner?

The daughter suggested King / Queen, declaring that would make her a Princess.

 

[Weedygarden]

Not sure id want to live in SD, no trees. But dang if they ain't set up nice

It depends upon the part of SD you are in. Black Hills has lots trees. Where these bunkers are located is south of the Hills.

If it was me, I would be planting trees, no matter where I lived on the plains.

 

[Snowman]

 

[d_marsh]

Well that did not go according to plan.

I had it all mapped out. I would meet her for a lunch date at a swanky eatery I had already selected, a single wrapped pink rose in my hand, fully prepared to ooze all the charm and masculinity I could muster. I would remind her about the firm’s condo and how I accepted their terms almost exclusively just to be closer to her. Then, after convincing her not to return to her office for the remainder of the day, I would transport her to my new residence, collecting the keys en route, give her a tour and with any luck test out the quality of the queen sized bed. Yep, this was going to be one hell of a lunch date. Only it never happened. And what did happen was not fun or fanciful. It’s been quite the week so far.

After shadowing the daughter for much of the morning, I sent off a brief but happy text message making sure we were still on for lunch before I received an unhappy brief response that lunch was off, providing no real explanation or excuse. My counter text asking for more details was met with a sharp, almost rude “It just is”. As text messages often fail to properly convey tone and inflection, as well as genuine concern, I decided to just give the lady a call. I did not receive an inviting hello when she answered; instead I received a curt “What do you need?” I asked what was going on and why she couldn’t make our lunch date. Her retort was a sharp “It’s not always about you and what you want”. The tension was immediate and I could feel myself wanting to snap back, but I know better. Instead I said, “Whoa, slow down. What’s going on?” but she was not in the right head space. “I have a life outside of you and sometimes that part needs to be my priority”. There was a momentary silence before she added “Unless you need something else I have to go”. I replied “Hey, whatever’s going on maybe you need to take a deep cleansing breath and…” Before I finished she shot back “Maybe you need to stop being such an *******” which was followed by the electronic sounds produced when someone ends a call, a nice way of saying she hung up on me.

I thrive in conflict. Throwing insults, fist fights, fire fights, stand offs, ambushes, interrogations; all of it resides comfortably in my wheelhouse. This conflict however was new and unpleasant; I did not like it, not at all. I have had unpleasant encounters with women before, I just never cared before. I would just sit quietly as they ranted on until they exhausted themselves and inevitably walked away. And I was always glad to see them go. ‘Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out’ was usually the last thing I ever thought or said to them, what they said back usually involved 4 letter words. In this case however, I knew it was her ADHD going into over drive, I just didn’t know what instigated it. I wanted resolution and an immediate return to sweet looks, soft kisses and satisfying hugs. Perhaps the correct move was to just give her some space and let her work it out, whatever it was. But I was clearly told to ‘just hug her, reassure her, and not take it personally’ when she lashed out at me. As I was already not all that far from her office and knowing I can’t hug her or reassure her from here; I set out to do so in person.

While en route I stopped at a Mexican food truck and grabbed a 6-pack of her favorite crispy tacos, some chips and guacamole and two bottles of Dr. Pepper first placed in a paper sack placed then inside a plastic to-go bag. Lunch was still on, one way or another. From there I made my way to her office with expedience subconsciously using my offensive driving skills as I worked through tactical-thinking scenarios, working out how I would penetrate her perimeter and seize control of her office before embracing her, supportively interrogating her and ultimately winning over her heart and mind. Operation Hot Hygienist was a go and my one man team was about to put boots on the ground. This mission was critical and failure was not an option.

When I walked into the lobby I could sense the tension. The receptionist, a woman I did not recognize and the lady were all at the front desk and they all seemed to be focused on a stack of papers. When the lady looked up and saw me I could almost feel the flaming daggers fly through the air. Her defenses however failed to stop my advance, nothing was going to. When I reached the desk she started to say something that I did not even hear, I set the bag of food down and wrapped my arms around her tightly. There may have been some initial resistance but she quickly melted into me. I occupied her territory as we nonverbally negotiated terms for her surrender or possibly just mutual disarmament. I could feel her tears moistening my thin shirt. She pulled away just long enough to grab a tissue from the counter as I grabbed the bag of food. She took my hand and escorted me to her office where she got a second, even longer embrace.

After she removed the remaining tears she explained that mid-morning she was served with intent to sue papers by a rather rude process server who pretended to be a potential patient. Her ex and the **** apparently followed through on their threat. The papers included an order to preserve records and other demands. When the lady immediately called the law firm she used for both personal and business matters, she found out that her lawyer was out of the office for a few days but an associate was available to assist. The lady just hung up and started reading through all the papers until she received a text from her good looking boyfriend confirming their lunch date. That was some bad timing on my part, not that I could have known. We sat down in the chairs across from her desk; I took her hand and asked her to please hear me out. The first words out of my mouth were a bold and brash “**** them”, which got the corners of her mouth to curl upward for just a second. I continued in firm brutish confidence, “I mean it, **** them. We are not going to let that piece of **** or his **** steal a moment of our happiness. We will fight them tooth & nail and teach them not to poke a sleeping bear. We will not give them any power or control over us. We are going to keep on living our best life and refuse to shed another tear, lose a minutes sleep, or ruin a perfect lunch date because of their mental illness or financial problems.” She got up, sat on my lap and wrapped her arms around me. I made it clear she was not alone in this, not for a second, that she was one part of team “**** them” and together we would bloody some lips, bruise some egos and maybe crack an orbital socket or two. Even though she wasn’t speaking I could feel the stress monkey climbing off of her back. Since I was on fire and my adrenaline was flowing I decided to add “And just so you know, I am not going anywhere. Even if you try and push me away or call me an *******.” She kissed me on the lips and replied “Just hug me”. After a little bit she said “Thank you for being my rock, I told you I could be difficult.” Then she got up, smiled at me and uttered “You said ‘us’ and ‘we’ a lot in that diatribe” before adding “You’re kind of sexy when you’re pissed off.” I responded “I know a college aged stalker who would not agree with you”.

Our battle implements had not been put away; they were just combined and aimed at a mutual enemy, one with a tiny sword and his ugly shield maiden. After discussing it with the lady I called my attorney & employer through my contact, asking if he could just take a look at the papers and provide a quick assessment. The earnest woman just said “send them over”. They were scanned in and sent via the lady’s work email. Not even 30 minutes later my attorney called back personally, almost laughing on the phone. It seems the dentist had downgraded his legal counsel since the divorce and his new ambulance chaser was known in the legal community to be a crayon short of a fun pack and not very good at his job. In the words of my lawyer “I would be more worried about drowning in the desert than I would be about this pre-litigation notice or any actual lawsuit they file.” He then suggested the lady hold tight, without care or concern, until her attorney was back and available. Before long we were eating tacos and cracking jokes.

Mission accomplished. Terms of surrender accepted.

And now I just sit in this apartment until she gets off work.

 

[Pearl]

Handled GREATLY!! The ex wants to be in her head, he's not good enough to be there! Good words from your lawyer, her lawyer will handle it!! Dr. Dud will be once again out of her life after her lawyer takes care of this matter! Excellent save Marsh!