The Ladies

[d_marsh]

She timed it right!! Y'all practically live together anyway, why not! On a practical note, if living together was going to ruin the relationship, why not find out early?!! Hubby and I moved in together a week after we met, nearly 33 years ago! I'm so excited for you guys!! Now chop chop, get to work cooking and cleaning, start earning your keep, lol!!

Oh I will be earning my keep alright. Her car needs washed.

That was my feeling too. Why not. Worst case scenario she throws me out and I have to figure something else out. I don't own any property anymore and I even donated my TV and microwave to the veterans place. I basically have the most well armed storage garage in state history with enough supplies to last one person for years and a few totes full of clothes and personal items. Besides, and again, I am perfectly fine with having a sugar mama. I just have to keep working out so she keeps me around into my 50's.

 

[Bacpacker]

Dang Marsh. From man whore to attached and shackin up that quick.
Congrats and enjoy

 

[d_marsh]

Dang Marsh. From man whore to attached and shackin up that quick.
Congrats and enjoy

I thought things were going crazy fast until @Pearl said she made it a week before moving in, then I felt a lot better.

Reality has yet to set in for me and I sort of feel like I am watching my life through someone else's eyes. At the same time I am not getting all those internal instinctual warnings to run into the mountains and hide. Maybe something happens at my age where they go dormant or maybe I am laying in a medical facility being fed through a tube and none of this is actually happening. Yep, that's probably it. NO ONE UNPLUG ME!

 

[Pearl]

We were young, but why not jump in? We felt it was right! You both are at a wonderful age, not young and stupid, not old geezers! She is NOT looking to make another mistake! So I agree with bacpacker, congrats and enjoy!! Life will change as you both get older, things will change NOW because this is a different place in this relationship.... Just enjoy the new places the changes take you!

 

[d_marsh]

We were young, but why not jump in? We felt it was right! You both are at a wonderful age, not young and stupid, not old geezers! She is NOT looking to make another mistake! So I agree with bacpacker, congrats and enjoy!! Life will change as you both get older, things will change NOW because this is a different place in this relationship.... Just enjoy the new places the changes take you!

The lady was so happy yesterday when I said yes that she couldn't stop smiling or following me around the apartment. After we ate pizza someone called and during the conversation she said that I was moving in. They must have said something negative because she responded with a snappy "I don't give a **** if people think we're moving fast". I already knew she was feisty, but that was only like the 10th curse word I have ever heard her utter. When she got off the phone I didn't ask who called, I figured if she wanted me to know she would have told me. Instead she went right back to being smiley and doting on me. And no, I never made it back to the compound last night. I had to wait until she went to work this morning to head out.

 

[d_marsh]

So I just talked to the daughter who volunteered that the phone call yesterday was the lady's older sister, the one I just found out existed casually like 3 weeks ago. Fun stuff. Apparently she called the daughter today asking if she thought me moving in was a good idea, which I am confident will seriously piss off the lady. The daughter just said "Heck yeah, he makes awesome breakfasts" which lead to a whole new line of questioning which ended with "He's only slept over once when mom was out of town, but nothing happened". Of course she was referring to nothing happening with the stalker, but that's now how her auntie took it. All this drama is probably a lot funnier to me than it is to the 3 ladies who share genetics.

 

[Digout]

ooohhh Boy.

 

[d_marsh]

The compound is void of property I claim as my own, the storage garage now houses a Chevy Colorado and most of my preps/property, and my clothing, toiletries, a few personal items and select weaponry are now safely put away in the 10% of the closet that is apparently designated for men's clothing, the 3 dresser drawers she was able to clean out and under the bed. More importantly Limanjalo is now resting peacefully in the living room with a nice view of the cityscape while Charlene has found a comfortable spot in a concrete parking garage. I am city people now. The lady texted and asked if I was still moving and I replied "Nope, just hanging out at home". She sent me back a big red heart and the words "I am coming home early, time for you to start earning your keep!".

 

[Bacpacker]

Congrats Marsh. Moving has always sucked for me. Glad it went good for you

 

[d_marsh]

Congrats Marsh. Moving has always sucked for me. Glad it went good for you

Oh, it sucked. It's just easier when 45% goes into a storage garage, 25% goes into the trash, 25% gets donated and only 5% actually makes it to the new place. I think it took me 4 1/2 total work days.

 

[d_marsh]

So this is how my new city lifestyle kicked off.

The lady came home, called me her roomie with a huge smile, snuggled with me on the sofa, gave me some kisses and said she was going in to the bedroom and I should meet her there in 10-15 minutes. I arrived at the scheduled time and she was fast asleep in her undies with an earbud in and her iPhone streaming 80's soft rock. I covered her up, backed out, shut the door and returned to my laptop.

The daughter came home, said "What's up" and walked straight back to her bedroom. I had to text her to find out what she wanted from the Chinese place. She texted me her order then asked when I was gonna start cooking dinners. I replied "tomorrow" to which she said "sweet".

 

[elkhound]

So this is how my new city lifestyle kicked off.

The lady came home, called me her roomie with a huge smile, snuggled with me on the sofa, gave me some kisses and said she was going in to the bedroom and I should meet her there in 10-15 minutes. I arrived at the scheduled time and she was fast asleep in her undies with an earbud in and her iPhone streaming 80's soft rock. I covered her up, backed out, shut the door and returned to my laptop.

The daughter came home, said "What's up" and walked straight back to her bedroom. I had to text her to find out what she wanted from the Chinese place. She texted me her order then asked when I was gonna start cooking dinners. I replied "tomorrow" to which she said "sweet".

HOUSE HUSBAND !!!

 

[d_marsh]

HOUSE HUSBAND !!!

Don't make me try out that middle finger emoji.

 

[elkhound]

 

[d_marsh]

She makes me dress like a Viking when I do the dishes.

 

[elkhound]

Don't make me try out that middle finger emoji.

Man its a badge of honor...fancy place to live,place to park your hot rods and access to a huge weapons cache with security...places to do things in city and regular loving from someone extra special...hell sign me up !!!

 

[d_marsh]

Man its a badge of honor...fancy place to live,place to park your hot rods and access to a huge weapons cache with security...places to do things in city and regular loving from someone extra special...hell sign me up !!!

Yeah, I am not really complaining. Plus these ladies sleep so much I could get another PT job shooting Venezuelan gang members.

 

[elkhound]

She makes me dress like a Viking when I do the dishes.

kick the bedroom door in after dishes and say Brunhild i have come to ravage thee...get that Valkyrie outfit on now !!

 

[d_marsh]

Apartment life-lesson #1, let sleeping ladies sleep.

I went in, sat next to her and gently woke her up before asking what she wanted from the Chinese place. She did not answer. It took her 15 full minutes to come out to the living room, sit on the sofa, shoot me the stink eye and give me her order. Seems not waking her up was incorrect, also waking her up was incorrect. Also asking for her order was incorrect, as would have been just ordering something for her with out asking, as would have been just not ordering at all. Ha Ha universe, good try. But I am made of heartier stuff than that. Plus I am her human kryptonite so all it took was a few smiles, a couple snuggles and some kisses on the neck to remove the sleepy demon and release the happy lady. And the universe rewarded with this fortune:

 

[teeceetx]

In 6 months, you'll be in deep doo-doo for having made them gain so much weight from your cooking!!!!

 

[d_marsh]

In 6 months, you'll be in deep doo-doo for having made them gain so much weight from your cooking!!!!

I plan to balance it out by dragging their ***** down to the fitness center with me in the morning! Or maybe I will just let them grow fat. That will make them less likely to run off or get kidnapped.

 

[elkhound]

I give you enough love emojis as of late i think i should feel a little dirty...lol

 

[Pearl]

Apartment life-lesson #1, let sleeping ladies sleep.

I went in, sat next to her and gently woke her up before asking what she wanted from the Chinese place. She did not answer. It took her 15 full minutes to come out to the living room, sit on the sofa, shoot me the stink eye and give me her order. Seems not waking her up was incorrect, also waking her up was incorrect. Also asking for her order was incorrect, as would have been just ordering something for her with out asking, as would have been just not ordering at all. Ha Ha universe, good try. But I am made of heartier stuff than that. Plus I am her human kryptonite so all it took was a few smiles, a couple snuggles and some kisses on the neck to remove the sleepy demon and release the happy lady. And the universe rewarded with this fortune:

View attachment 163149

 

[Pearl]

You have a lot of learning to do!! What she wants, when she wants it, all around the sleep schedule!! You will have to order for her, OR cook the exact thing she is wanting, all without asking her, no waking her!! You are IN IT MY FRIEND!! The apartment now becomes and feels like an ALIEN SPACESHIP!!

 

[d_marsh]

You have a lot of learning to do!! What she wants, when she wants it, all around the sleep schedule!! You will have to order for her, OR cook the exact thing she is wanting, all without asking her, no waking her!! You are IN IT MY FRIEND!! The apartment now becomes and feels like an ALIEN SPACESHIP!!

Then she better be providing me a weekly stipend. A man like me doesn't come cheap! You might have to serve as arbitrator as we work through the terms and conditions of our relationship and living arrangements.

 

[d_marsh]

Apartment life-lesson #2: first they do the coffee, then they do the things.

The lady was out of bed 20 minutes before me, but I was in the fitness center for 20+ minutes before she showed up. Seems she needs coffee and internet before she can throw on workout attire and ride an elevator down to the main floor. Before my workout was even half done she was walking on the treadmill to cool down. I was just finishing up on a machine when a nice look woman, maybe late 30's with short blond hair came over and started chatting me up. The lady was on this situation like Hillary on a witness. She sort of slipped between her and the machine, sat on my lap, kissed me and asked how my workout was going before looking up and saying "Oh excuse me, I didn't see you there". I suspect she will now provide me workout t-shirts with pictures of her face on them and the word "TAKEN" across the front and back.

 

[Snowman]

Don't serve the same Meal without at least 7 days gone by...!!!

 

[Pearl]

You need a tip jar for the kitchen countertop

 

[d_marsh]

You need a tip jar for the kitchen countertop

And the nightstand.

So I menu planned, cleaned out the fridge and freezer then went grocery shopping. Lady sent me a text asking what I was up to, then responded with "We have a grocery service". I didn't even know what that was. Apparently all I have to do is make a list and a personal shopper buys it, loads it up and delivers it the apartment. Then I find out the cleaning people remove the outdated or spoiled food from the fridge on Thursdays. Trying to decide if I want to live this pampered of a life or if I am just going to take over these duties. I have never even heard of a grocery service.

 

[Pearl]

That could cut into your tips!! So put the bigger jar on the nightstand! Changing your username to d_spoiled!!