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132 days till I get to give and get presents...

Jim
 
I think, I'm going to lose my drivers license and all just because of a stupid police officer.

The conversation went like this, when I got pulled over in my car:

Officer: "License and registration, please, I think you are drunk!"

Me: "I assure you, I did not drink anything."

Officer: "Ok, let's do a little test! Imagine driving in the dark on a highway at night, when you see two lights in the distance. What is this?"

Me: "A car."

Officer:"Of course! But which one? A Mercedes, an Audi or a Ford?"

Me:"I have no idea!"

Officer:"So, you're drunk."

Me:"But I didn't drink anything."

Officer:"Okay, one more test -- Imagine, you drive in the dark on a highway at night, and there is one light coming at you.What is it?

Me:"A motorcycle."

Officer:"Of course! But which one? A Honda, a Kawasaki or a Harley?"

Me:"I have no idea!"

Officer:"As I suspected, you're drunk!"

Then I started to get annoyed and asked a counter question.

Me: "So..., counter question -- You're driving in the dark on a highway at night and see a woman on the roadside. She wears a mini skirt, fishnet stockings, high heeled shoes and only a bra as a top. What is this?"

Officer:"A prostitute of course."

Me:"Yes, but which one? Your daughter, your wife or your mother?"

Things went downhill from there and now I have a court date to attend...
 
I love the Red Green Show. You guys ever watch it?
It does suck. Although some people (like my brother) react by doubling down and pretending they are right & maybe calling you an a-hole for telling them they were wrong.
Put more succinctly, eschew jejune sesquipedalianist proclivities.
One of my father's favorite quotes (that he came up with) was "Sesquipedalianism is the verbal shield of pusillanimous eremites, hence we must eschew esoteric obfuscation and thereby obviate our opprobrium."
 
Why was that guy showing his belly off before he got his head slammed into the street?
He walks toward the cop reaching behind his back with one hand.
He's lucky to be alive.
He pulled up his shirt after the cop drew down on him to show he had no gun in his waistband.
 
Oh. So he was obnoxious, and the cop saw he was unarmed because he showed his belly. Why'd the other guy then charge him?
I thought after Phideaux's post that showing his belly maybe meant, "taze me right here".
You miss the details.
Notice the 2 women. Do they look pissed to you?
Somebody called the cops for a good reason.
They showed up, and it is OBVIOUSLY NOT NYC! gaah
 

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