The Ladies

[12icemaker]

You need to ponder your next meeting with every bit of your soul @d_marsh it must be completely honest and without ego, shields and fear, it is moving from threat of check to full checkmate.

Do as she said and look into the EYES in the mirror with nothing in your mind and let the thoughts run just as you do before you go into a really dangerous assignment, remember all of the answers and lack of an answer that are firmly true.

It is not a conquest anymore it is a union, not necessarily in Matrimonial but a real joining of 1st souls then hearts.

Be warned she will see what is in your eyes once your souls are joined.

I should say that you are at a point of lifetime future or returning to the unknown past.

Money and stature have nothing to do with happiness in reality they are shallow and vanity driven.

 

[12icemaker]

Whoa there. I wouldn't go that far. But something is happening.



Thank you. I think the military trained me how to write through their never ending demand for highly detailed reports and documented observations.

I suppose this thread really is just a relationship blog. Maybe someday I will show her a link and see how her perception of these dates aligned or differed from mine.

NOT ON YOUR LIFE, never do anything like that, not to hide, anything but things thought and penned in quandary may not be seen by those inscribed as they were meant.

 

[d_marsh]

NOT ON YOUR LIFE, never do anything like that, not to hide, anything but things thought and penned in quandary may not be seen by those inscribed as they were meant.

Fair.

 

[d_marsh]

Have you heard from the ex?

I forgot to mention that a day or two after my post about how the Brazilian called to say goodbye I heard on the news that a passenger plane crashed in Brazil. Right in the same time frame I suspected she would have been flying home. I spent 30 minutes or so debating if I should reach out. I asked the lady what she thought and got a "Are you serious? Of course you should text or call her." So I did and she was still in the states but heard the same news and was freaking out. I got off that call as soon as possible so as not to make her think it was anything more than a "Are you dead?" call.

 

[Dave V]

@d_marsh , do you know what an excellent writer you are? You are truly talented! I love your story, but your writing is always so well done.

Agreed! I was going to say, someday when you're no longer doing security work, (there will be that time somewhere in the future) or even between gigs, you could use this site to flesh out sanitized versions of adventures you've had. I imagine you could put us there with a Magnum PI sort of narrative that would keep readers hooked. Use the interest, feedback, and energy of your fellow forum members to motivate your writing of each chapter until you finish your yarn. Each time you complete an adventure, find a publisher and put out your next New York Times Best Seller! I'm sure many of us would read them!

 

[d_marsh]

Agreed! I was going to say, someday when you're no longer doing security work, (there will be that time somewhere in the future) or even between gigs, you could use this site to flesh out sanitized versions of adventures you've had. I imagine you could put us there with a Magnum PI sort of narrative that would keep readers hooked. Use the interest, feedback, and energy of your fellow forum members to motivate your writing of each chapter until you finish your yarn. Each time you complete an adventure, find a publisher and put out your next New York Times Best Seller! I'm sure many of us would read them!

I have only done one job for the law firm, but I thoroughly documented it as it was both bizarre and interesting. I was thinking it could make an entertaining series and one where my heart isn't being batted around like a tether ball while other parts of me sit around doing nothing.

 

[Dave V]

You can write what you know well, and in addition to your current employment, you probably have had MANY sorties in your past that you remember in great detail and could chapter-ize as well?!

 

[d_marsh]

You can write what you know well, and in addition to your current employment, you probably have had MANY sorties in your past that you remember in great detail and could chapter-ize as well?!

True, but they would have to be fictionalized as I have signed many nondisclosure agreements.

 

[Weedygarden]

True, but they would have to be fictionalized as I have signed many nondisclosure agreements.

I believe that many books and movie scripts are fictionalized versions of real life stories.
My daughter went to a school of the arts as a writing major. She has real life stories that she wants to write into movie scripts. She is just so busy with her full time job and an app that she has been working on for a few years. She has FOMO, fear of missing out, so if there is a concert, ball game or some other social event, she goes.

 

[teeceetx]

My only thought, d_marsh ... you have met a formidable woman.

 

[d_marsh]

My only thought, d_marsh ... you have met a formidable woman.

Of that there is no doubt.

 

[12icemaker]

Some times it is best to wait a LONG time to write about covert work, I knew two victims of home fires myself.

 

[Weedygarden]

then one day in the middle of her seemingly fairytale life had a dental assistant walk up to her and say, “He doesn’t love you anymore, he loves me!”

Letting the dental assistant tell her, instead of him, just makes me sick. What a piece of **** he is! And the funneling of money! He thought he was smarter than her. He thought he could totally screw her over and go on with his happy life, while totally destroying her. While he totally broke her heart, he had no concern for her. None! Zero! I wish his name was out there and that he could lose his patients and business. I hate when people play with other people's lives and have zero concern for them. He used her in so many ways.

 

[Pearl]

Of that there is no doubt.

Very smart and perceptive, she learned from her bad marriage! She is thoroughly reading you and trusting herself that she is making a good decision! She was by no way thinking about a relationship when you two met!! Now she has an awesome boyfriend! And she's a hottie!

 

[Pearl]

Letting the dental assistant tell her, instead of him, just makes me sick. What a piece of **** he is! And the funneling of money! He thought he was smarter than her. He thought he could totally screw her over and go on with his happy life, while totally destroying her. While he totally broke her heart, he had no concern for her. None! Zero! I wish his name was out there and that he could lose his patients and business. I hate when people play with other people's lives and have zero concern for them. He used her in so many ways.

I'm amazed at this gal's strength and trust in herself! I'm glad she is living life! She picked herself financially and emotionally!!

 

[Spikedriver]

My only thought, d_marsh ... you have met a formidable woman.

Sometimes it takes a woman who knows the right buttons to push, and the buttons not to push, and most importantly when to push the right buttons and when NOT to push them. Timing is everything, and it appears this lady's sense of timing is impeccable.

Formidable, indeed...

 

[d_marsh]

Letting the dental assistant tell her, instead of him, just makes me sick. What a piece of **** he is!

When you screw your wife over so bad that she despises you, your daughter despises you and your own mother despises you; rest assured you are the place a doctor would shove an enema tube.

I'm amazed at this gal's strength and trust in herself! I'm glad she is living life! She picked herself financially and emotionally!!

She decided early on the best way to "win" was to live a very happy and fulfilling life. Nothing says screw you like coming out of the BS noticeably better off than you were back when. I am starting to think I might have interviewed to be part of that screw you and was selected to continue in the hiring process.

Sometimes it takes a woman who knows the right buttons to push, and the buttons not to push, and most importantly when to push the right buttons and when NOT to push them. Timing is everything, and it appears this lady's sense of timing is impeccable.

Formidable, indeed...

And that describes her perfectly!

 

[sonya123]

Letting the dental assistant tell her, instead of him, just makes me sick. What a piece of **** he is! And the funneling of money! He thought he was smarter than her. He thought he could totally screw her over and go on with his happy life, while totally destroying her. While he totally broke her heart, he had no concern for her. None! Zero! I wish his name was out there and that he could lose his patients and business. I hate when people play with other people's lives and have zero concern for them. He used her in so many ways.

this isn't anything unusual, many guys are pieces of crap like that, my husband #1 was one just like it
LOL if I wrote down all the crap I dealt with in my life caused by picking the wrong guys, it would read like a series of unfortunate events

 

[Bacpacker]

Luckily I only had one POS like that. And we had no money, so she left with diddly squat, and me with a stack of bills. Still glad to be shed of her

 

[Weedygarden]

this isn't anything unusual, many guys are pieces of crap like that, my husband #1 was one just like it
LOL if I wrote down all the crap I dealt with in my life caused by picking the wrong guys, it would read like a series of unfortunate events

It isn't just men who are pieces of ****. Women can be too!

My ex just went off with his affair partner. Good riddance.

I totally get her saying, "I will never get married again." When your heart is ripped out shredded and stomped on, the physical pain is real. My actual heart hurt when it happened to me, let alone the emotional pain. For me, time is what it took to heal. Maybe some people don't hurt as much, or can move on faster than others.

 

[sonya123]

It isn't just men who are pieces of ****. Women can be too!

My ex just went off with his affair partner. Good riddance.

I totally get her saying, "I will never get married again." When your heart is ripped out shredded and stomped on, the physical pain is real. My actual heart hurt when it happened to me, let alone the emotional pain. For me, time is what it took to heal. Maybe some people don't hurt as much, or can move on faster than others.

My solution was always move on, find a better guy. Maybe not a good way of doing things but oh well
I have now been married for 26 years to the same guy, after the first disaster and the second "settle for safe" that I was not really in love with much ...but we still get along ok ( have a daughter together after all and both found new people we wanted to be with around the same time) . Divorces don't always end ugly . Even number 3 makes me crazy sometimes, he doesn't cheat, and is basically a nice guy but has other issues

But we are sidetracking D marshes thread...sorry

 

[Pearl]

My solution was always move on, find a better guy. Maybe not a good way of doing things but oh well
I have now been married for 26 years to the same guy, after the first disaster and the second "settle for safe" that I was not really in love with much ...but we still get along ok ( have a daughter together after all and both found new people we wanted to be with around the same time) . Divorces don't always end ugly . Even number 3 makes me crazy sometimes, he doesn't cheat, and is basically a nice guy but has other issues

But we are sidetracking D marshes thread...sorry

No, y'all are solidifying his not wanting to be married!

 

[Weedygarden]

No, y'all are solidifying his not wanting to be married!

I think I've told this story before. I have a cousin, 6' 1", an odd woman whose parents allowed her to whimper and then they would give her whatever she wanted, even if it belonged to someone else, like me. She belonged to a tall club and met a man who was 6' 3" tall. They dated, and eventually moved in together. He always said he never wanted to get married. They lived together at least 10 years. No children. One day he broke up with her. She was devastated. But then he had the audacity to ask what time our mutual aunt was serving Thanksgiving dinner in a week or two. She told him that he wasn't invited, but he was so arrogant he didn't understand why not. Within a year, he was married to someone! Less than a year later!!! He was using her until his perfect or preferred person came along. It is not an uncommon thing.

 

[d_marsh]

The story is probably as old as time. Woman always want the bad guy who treats them poorly, men always want the loose woman who will never be faithful. Woman will lust after a broke loser with a sweet tongue, men get distracted by chests and backsides ignoring the deep-seated crazy. All of our natural instincts are wrong for the world we live in. It's amazing the population hasn't dwindled into nothing.

You live and you learn.

 

[d_marsh]

No, y'all are solidifying his not wanting to be married!

I totally get her saying, "I will never get married again." When your heart is ripped out shredded and stomped on, the physical pain is real. My actual heart hurt when it happened to me, let alone the emotional pain. For me, time is what it took to heal. Maybe some people don't hurt as much, or can move on faster than others.

Even if I repented and embraced the idea of a gov't sanctioned & documented partnership, I don't think she would. She commented this past weekend that she would rather have a man who woke up and chose to stay with her every single day out of pure desire than a legally obligated husband, even if he loved her. She learned a hard lesson and won't make that mistake again.

 

[Tirediron]

I am curious why everybody is so hung up on a piece of paper, which by the divorce count means so very little. commitment with out the paper work is probably far stronger.

 

[Pearl]

I am curious why everybody is so hung up on a piece of paper, which by the divorce count means so very little. commitment with out the paper work is probably far stronger.

Yep, 32, almost 33 years with no papers and no kids! Works for us!!

 

[d_marsh]

Yep, 32, almost 33 years with no papers and no kids! Works for us!!

You just made me have one of those internal mental freak outs that I still have not recovered from. Your post made me curious how long the lady and I have been dating, so I clicked on the calendar and looked it up. 3 1/2 weeks. 3 1/2 weeks! I would have put $1,000 cash down that it had been longer. I think we have had like 12-13 dates, 40 phone calls and 200 text messages in that span. How could it only be 3 1/2 weeks!? The Whitehouse must have made those weeks 10+ days each so they could report that weekly income was up by 33%.

Also that makes this dry streak one of the longest I have experienced in a long long time. I thought for sure I would have died 14 days in but somehow my heart is still beating and my synapses firing. I may need to write a book about that. Men everywhere might need this information.

 

[Pearl]

A few years back an older couple I clean for were celebrating an anniversary. I asked him how many years, he came back with a quick 150 years!! After she gave him the death look, she said 65! He came right back and said " you know how they have that feels like temperature on the weather report "!

 

[sonya123]

I am curious why everybody is so hung up on a piece of paper, which by the divorce count means so very little. commitment with out the paper work is probably far stronger.

better tax rate

besides, I think a lot of States have laws that you are treated as if you were married if you live together long enough if I remember that correctly